Two Italian construction workers were in the field on an extremely hot day working.. the one says to the other «hey how come we do all a da work and he gets all a da money?» pointing to the supervisor. The other says, «I don’t know, go ask him.» So Guido goes up to the supervisor and says «Hey, how come we do all a da work and you get all a da money?» The supervisor says «Intelligence». Guido says «what is this intelligence?» The supervisor puts his hand on a tree and says «Hita my hand as hard as you can!» Guido winds up and with all his might tries to hit the supervisors hand. Just as he almost does the supervisor pulls his hand away and Guido hits the tree! The supervisor says «That’s intelligence». Still smarting Guido goes back to his co-worker and his co-worker says «Hey what did he say?» With a sheepish look on his face Guido puts his hand on his face and says «hita my hand as hard as you can. . .»
My future profession is lawyer.
Топик по английскому art.
Related topics:
- A construction worker goes to the doctor and saysA construction worker goes to the doctor and says, «Doc, I’m constipated.» The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, «Lean over the table.» The construction worker leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a baseball bat, and then sends him into the bathroom. He comes out a ... Читать далее...
- A construction worker was whistlingA construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled «Well you’re an ugly bitch anyway!» The girl turned around and replied «It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won’t give you ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова constructionConstruction — сооружение, строительство Перевод слова Modular construction — модульная конструкция machinery construction — машиностроение dam construction project — проект по строительству плотины The new skyscraper is under Construction. Строится новый небоскреб. We both heard what he said, but she put quite a different Construction on it. Мы все слышали его слова, но она истолковала ... Читать далее...
- What is intelligenceTwo men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, «Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?» «I don’t know,» responded the other. «I’ll ask him.» So he climbed out of the hole ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы under construction[under construction] {adv. phr.} In the process of being built orrepaired. It is a good idea to take the train to work while theexpressway is under construction....
- Перевод слова ItalianItalian — итальянский; итальянец, итальянка Перевод слова Appetence for the Italian art — приверженность итальянскому искусству Italian roof — архит. покатая крыша the Italians — итальянцы He prefers shoes of Italian derivation. Он предпочитает туфли итальянского производства. Miss pronounces Italian very Americanly. Мисс произносит итальянские слова слишком по-американски. It is his Italian accent that distinguishes ... Читать далее...
- A construction worker came home just in time to find his wifeA construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his Wet Willy in a vise. He secured it tightly and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, «Stop! ... Читать далее...
- The Frenchman and the ItalianThe Frenchman and the Italian were in the woods hunting together when suddenly a voluptuous blonde girl raced across their path, totally nude. «Would I love to eat that? Oui, oui!» the Frenchman said, smacking his lips. So the Italian shot her....
- A Russian, an Italian and an Irishman got out of workA Russian, an Italian and an Irishman got out of work and were deciding where to go for a drink. The Irishman said «Let’s all go to O’Learys. With every third round, the bartender will give each of us a free Guiness.» The Italian said «That sounds good, but if we go to Baldini’s with ... Читать далее...
- A Star Trek ConventionGuido: Whoa, check you out! That’s a great Costume. Are you going to the Star Trek Convention? Rita: Yeah, it’s in town until Sunday. Have you ever been to one? Guido: Me? No way! Don’t get me wrong. I’m a Fan of the shows. And, No offense, but I thought only Geeks went to the ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы under construction, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: under construction Перевод: в процессе строительства, строящийся Пример: The hotel was still under construction, two years after it began. Через два года после начала строительства, гостиница все еще строилась....
- Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boyTwo friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at the same time. The Italian boy’s father presents him with a new pistol. On the other side of town, at his bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boy receives a beautiful gold watch. The next day at school, the two boys are showing each ... Читать далее...
- A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an AmericanA Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives. «Last night I made love to my wife four times,» the Frenchman bragged, «and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored ... Читать далее...
- An old italian couple is walking around in the mallAn old italian couple is walking around in the mall. After a while they get separated so the woman goes up to the first saleswoman she sees and ask: «Escusa me, have you senn-a me Tony. He’s got a big-a belly and a-lots of curly black hair?» The saleswoman answers that she hasn’t seen her ... Читать далее...
- Italian teenagers get €500 ‘culture bonus’From November 3rd, every Italian teen celebrating their 18th birthday before December 31st 2016 can claim €500 from the government, to spend on cultural items. Every Italian resident from the class of 1998 — a total of 574,000 — can claim their ‘culture bonus’, which they can use to buy books, concert tickets, theatre tickets, ... Читать далее...
- Last LunchThree steel workers were having lunch at the construction site, a 20 story building. The first worker is Italian and when he looks in his lunch box, he exclaims, «Oh, no, if I have to eat spaghetti for lunch one more time, I going to jump off the 20th floor and kill myself.» The second ... Читать далее...
- My heart setA certain old gentleman thought his eyesight was going bad, and he was advised to go to see an eye doctor. He goes in to see the doctor, and the doctor said, «All right, let’s check you out. You sit down here on this stool. You put your right hand over your right eye and ... Читать далее...
- Construction Worker Hides Waldo On Site For Kids In Hospital Next DoorOne man is helping kids find a little joy. Jason Haney, a construction foreman, hides a life-size cutout he made of Where’s Waldo on site every day for kids who are staying at a hospital next door to find. «It’s just for the kids to get their minds off of things,»Haney told The Huffington Post. ... Читать далее...
- A bus stops and two Italian men get onA bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following: «Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two ... Читать далее...
- What’s the difference between an Italian mother and a Jewish mother?What’s the difference between an Italian mother and a Jewish mother? An Italian mother says, «If you don’t eat it, I’ll kill you.» A Jewish mother says, «If you don’t eat it, I’ll kill myself.»...
- The Italian colonel had his brigade arrayed in full paradeThe Italian colonel had his brigade arrayed in full parade dress, proudly ready for inspection by the general. That worthy warrior strolled back and forth before the troops, and sniffed and stopped abruptly. «Colonel!» he spat out. «Yes, general!» the colonel quavered. «Your troops, your troops,» stormed the general. «They look very nice, they stand ... Читать далее...
- Visiting a Construction SiteBill: Ma’am! ma’am! Estelle: Yes? Bill: Ma’am, you’re not supposed to be here. This is a Construction site and you’re not allowed. Please don’t step on that Scaffolding. It’s dangerous. Estelle: Oh, I just wanted a quick look to see how the building is Coming along. Look at all this Lumber and Brick. The Foundation ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы hand in glove / hand and glove (with someone), значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: hand in glove / hand and glove (with someone) Перевод: в тесной связи, заодно Пример: The supervisor and manager work hand in glove to create a positive atmosphere in the company. Руководитель и менеджер работают в тесном контакте друг с другом, чтобы создать позитивную атмосферу в компании....
- Перевод идиомы talk until one is blue in the face, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: talk until one is blue in the face Перевод: говорить до посинения, до изнеможения Пример: I talked until I was blue in the face but still my supervisor would not let me take a day off from work. Я говорил до изнеможения, но мой менеджер никак не хотел дать мне выходного....
- Brain or muscles?The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. «Why don’t you put your money where your mouth is,» he said. ... Читать далее...
- There were these three morticians talking aboutThere were these three morticians talking about their greatest feats. The first one says, «I had this soldier who stepped on a land mine. Took me three days to get him ready for an open casket funeral!!» The next guy says, «oh yeah? I had this construction worker fall 15 stories, then he got run ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы face to face, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: face to face Перевод: лицом к лицу; лично Пример: I had a face-to-face meeting with my supervisor to talk about my job performance. Я поговорил со своим менеджером лицом к лицу по поводу качества моей работы....
- New Minnesota Vikings stadium construction cost more than NASA’s trip to PlutoThe cost to construct NFL stadiums has reached an astronomical level — literally. Pat Kessler of CBS Minnesota recently pointed out a mind-blowing fact: The construction of the Minnesota Vikings’ new stadium is a more costly project than the space probe NASA sent to Pluto. The Vikings’ new home, recently christened U. S. Bank Stadium, ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова intelligenceIntelligence — интеллект, ум, умственные способности Перевод слова A man of no small intelligence — очень неглупый человек a high order of intelligence — высокий интеллект intelligence test — проверка умственных способностей outstanding intelligence — выдающийся ум It is difficult to quantify Intelligence. Трудно измерить уровень интеллекта. Dolphins show a high level of Intelligence. Дельфины ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы hand-to-hand[hand-to-hand] {adj.} Close to each other; near enough to hit eachother. The result of the battle was decided in hand-to-handcombat. When the police tried to break up the riot, there washand-to-hand fighting with fists, stones, and clubs. Compare:FACE-TO-FACE....
- Перевод слова workerWorker — работник, трудящийся, сотрудник Перевод слова Factory and office workers — рабочие и служащие brain worker — работник умственного труда fellow worker — сотрудник, сослуживец She is a very responsible Worker. Она — очень ответственный работник. The Worker bee is neuter. Рабочая пчела бесплодна. The Worker was dismissed for laziness. Рабочего уволили за лень. ... Читать далее...
- Hiring Temp WorkersBethany: I just talked to Steve about hiring Replacements for Cyril, who quit last month and for Megan, who is leaving at the end of this week. Do you know what he told me? He doesn’t want to hire Permanent replacements. He wants To make do with Temps! Enrique: I can see it from Steve’s ... Читать далее...
- Who invented sexA Greek and Italian were sitting down one day debating who had the superior culture. The Greek says, «We have the Parthenon» The Italian says, «We have the Colosseum» The Greek says «We had great Mathematicians» The Italian says «We had the Roman Empire» …and so on and so on and then the Greek says: ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы white-collar workers[white-collar workers] {n. phr.} Workers employed in offices and atdesks as opposed to those who work as manual workers; the middleclass. It is a well-known fact that white-collar workers are lesswell organized than unionized manual workers. Contrast BLUE-COLLARWORKERS....
- A Workers StrikeMasako: I think we should Strike. We need to force Management to listen to our Grievances. Salvador: Hold on. I think you’re being too Hasty. It’s up to our union to call a strike, not the workers. Masako: I’m not suggesting a formal strike, but we could organize a Sickout. That would send a message ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы face[face] See: BLUE IN THE FACE, CUT OFF ONE’S NOSE TO SPITE ONE’SFACE, FLY IN THE FACE OF, HATCHET FACE, HIDE ONE’S FACE, IN ONE’SFACE, IN THE FACE OF, LONG FACE, LOOK IN THE EYE or LOOK IN THE FACE, MAKE A FACE, ON THE FACE OF IT, SAVE FACE, SET ONE’S FACE AGAINST, SHOOT ... Читать далее...
- Working on the roadA fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then ... Читать далее...
- A young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is bakingA young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. He looks at his mother and says «Look Momma, I’m a white boy.» His mother slaps him hard On the face and says «Boy, go show your Daddy.» The ... Читать далее...
- Bosses versus workersWhen I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. When I don’t do it, I am lazy. When my boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy. When I do it without being told, I’m trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы raise a hand against someone or something / lift a hand against someone or something, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: raise a hand against someone or something / lift a hand against someone or something Перевод: поднять руку на кого-либо или что-либо, ударить или пригрозить ударить Пример: If the man raises a hand against his supervisor the police will be called. Если человек поднимет руку на своего менеджера, будет вызвана полиция....
Two Italian construction workers