Two Italian construction workers

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1. What is intelligence Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, “Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?” “I don’t know,” responded the other. “I’ll ask him.” So he climbed out of the hole […]...
2. A construction worker was whistling A construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled “Well you’re an ugly bitch anyway!” The girl turned around and replied “It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won’t give you […]...
3. A construction worker goes to the doctor and says A construction worker goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I’m constipated.” The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, “Lean over the table.” The construction worker leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a baseball bat, and then sends him into the bathroom. He comes out a […]...
4. A Star Trek Convention Guido: Whoa, check you out! That’s a great Costume. Are you going to the Star Trek Convention? Rita: Yeah, it’s in town until Sunday. Have you ever been to one? Guido: Me? No way! Don’t get me wrong. I’m a Fan of the shows. And, No offense, but I thought only Geeks went to the […]...
5. My heart set A certain old gentleman thought his eyesight was going bad, and he was advised to go to see an eye doctor. He goes in to see the doctor, and the doctor said, “All right, let’s check you out. You sit down here on this stool. You put your right hand over your right eye and […]...
6. A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his Wet Willy in a vise. He secured it tightly and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, “Stop! […]...
7. Перевод идиомы hand in glove / hand and glove (with someone), значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: hand in glove / hand and glove (with someone) Перевод: в тесной связи, заодно Пример: The supervisor and manager work hand in glove to create a positive atmosphere in the company. Руководитель и менеджер работают в тесном контакте друг с другом, чтобы создать позитивную атмосферу в компании....
8. Перевод идиомы talk until one is blue in the face, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: talk until one is blue in the face Перевод: говорить до посинения, до изнеможения Пример: I talked until I was blue in the face but still my supervisor would not let me take a day off from work. Я говорил до изнеможения, но мой менеджер никак не хотел дать мне выходного....
9. Перевод идиомы face to face, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: face to face Перевод: лицом к лицу; лично Пример: I had a face-to-face meeting with my supervisor to talk about my job performance. Я поговорил со своим менеджером лицом к лицу по поводу качества моей работы....
10. Перевод слова intelligence Intelligence – интеллект, ум, умственные способности Перевод слова A man of no small intelligence – очень неглупый человек a high order of intelligence – высокий интеллект intelligence test – проверка умственных способностей outstanding intelligence – выдающийся ум It is difficult to quantify Intelligence. Трудно измерить уровень интеллекта. Dolphins show a high level of Intelligence. Дельфины […]...
11. Значение идиомы hand-to-hand [hand-to-hand] {adj.} Close to each other; near enough to hit eachother. The result of the battle was decided in hand-to-handcombat. When the police tried to break up the riot, there washand-to-hand fighting with fists, stones, and clubs. Compare:FACE-TO-FACE....
12. A Russian, an Italian and an Irishman got out of work A Russian, an Italian and an Irishman got out of work and were deciding where to go for a drink. The Irishman said “Let’s all go to O’Learys. With every third round, the bartender will give each of us a free Guiness.” The Italian said “That sounds good, but if we go to Baldini’s with […]...
13. Перевод слова worker Worker – работник, трудящийся, сотрудник Перевод слова Factory and office workers – рабочие и служащие brain worker – работник умственного труда fellow worker – сотрудник, сослуживец She is a very responsible Worker. Она – очень ответственный работник. The Worker bee is neuter. Рабочая пчела бесплодна. The Worker was dismissed for laziness. Рабочего уволили за лень. […]...
14. Hiring Temp Workers Bethany: I just talked to Steve about hiring Replacements for Cyril, who quit last month and for Megan, who is leaving at the end of this week. Do you know what he told me? He doesn’t want to hire Permanent replacements. He wants To make do with Temps! Enrique: I can see it from Steve’s […]...
15. Значение идиомы under construction [under construction] {adv. phr.} In the process of being built orrepaired. It is a good idea to take the train to work while theexpressway is under construction....
16. Значение идиомы white-collar workers [white-collar workers] {n. phr.} Workers employed in offices and atdesks as opposed to those who work as manual workers; the middleclass. It is a well-known fact that white-collar workers are lesswell organized than unionized manual workers. Contrast BLUE-COLLARWORKERS....
17. A Workers Strike Masako: I think we should Strike. We need to force Management to listen to our Grievances. Salvador: Hold on. I think you’re being too Hasty. It’s up to our union to call a strike, not the workers. Masako: I’m not suggesting a formal strike, but we could organize a Sickout. That would send a message […]...
18. Значение идиомы face [face] See: BLUE IN THE FACE, CUT OFF ONE’S NOSE TO SPITE ONE’SFACE, FLY IN THE FACE OF, HATCHET FACE, HIDE ONE’S FACE, IN ONE’SFACE, IN THE FACE OF, LONG FACE, LOOK IN THE EYE or LOOK IN THE FACE, MAKE A FACE, ON THE FACE OF IT, SAVE FACE, SET ONE’S FACE AGAINST, SHOOT […]...
19. Construction Worker Hides Waldo On Site For Kids In Hospital Next Door One man is helping kids find a little joy. Jason Haney, a construction foreman, hides a life-size cutout he made of Where’s Waldo on site every day for kids who are staying at a hospital next door to find. “It’s just for the kids to get their minds off of things,”Haney told The Huffington Post. […]...
20. A young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking A young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. He looks at his mother and says “Look Momma, I’m a white boy.” His mother slaps him hard On the face and says “Boy, go show your Daddy.” The […]...
21. Working on the road A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then […]...
22. Bosses versus workers When I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. When I don’t do it, I am lazy. When my boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy. When I do it without being told, I’m trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that […]...
23. Перевод идиомы raise a hand against someone or something / lift a hand against someone or something, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: raise a hand against someone or something / lift a hand against someone or something Перевод: поднять руку на кого-либо или что-либо, ударить или пригрозить ударить Пример: If the man raises a hand against his supervisor the police will be called. Если человек поднимет руку на своего менеджера, будет вызвана полиция....
24. A bus stops and two Italian men get on A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following: “Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together. I come again. Two […]...
25. The Frenchman and the Italian The Frenchman and the Italian were in the woods hunting together when suddenly a voluptuous blonde girl raced across their path, totally nude. “Would I love to eat that? Oui, oui!” the Frenchman said, smacking his lips. So the Italian shot her....
26. The couple was dining out when the wife noticed The couple was dining out when the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. “Elliot,” she said, pointing “do you see that man downing bourbon at the bar?” The husband looked over and nodded. “Well,” the woman continued, “he’s been drinking like that for 10 years, ever since I jilted him!” The husband returned […]...
27. Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy Two friends, an Italian boy and a Jewish boy, come of age at the same time. The Italian boy’s father presents him with a new pistol. On the other side of town, at his bar Mitzvah, the Jewish boy receives a beautiful gold watch. The next day at school, the two boys are showing each […]...
28. Italian teenagers get €500 ‘culture bonus’ From November 3rd, every Italian teen celebrating their 18th birthday before December 31st 2016 can claim €500 from the government, to spend on cultural items. Every Italian resident from the class of 1998 – a total of 574,000 – can claim their ‘culture bonus’, which they can use to buy books, concert tickets, theatre tickets, […]...
29. An old italian couple is walking around in the mall An old italian couple is walking around in the mall. After a while they get separated so the woman goes up to the first saleswoman she sees and ask: “Escusa me, have you senn-a me Tony. He’s got a big-a belly and a-lots of curly black hair?” The saleswoman answers that she hasn’t seen her […]...
30. A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives. “Last night I made love to my wife four times,” the Frenchman bragged, “and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored […]...
31. Значение идиомы hand [hand] See: AT HAND, BIRD IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH, BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS ONE, CLEAN HANDS, DIRTY ONE’S HANDS, EAT OUTOF ONE’S HAND, FORCE ONE’S HAND, FREE HAND, FROM HAND TO HAND, GLADHAND, HAM-HANDED, HANG HEAVY or HANG HEAVY ON ONE’S HANDS, HAT INHAND, HAVE A HAND IN, HAVE […]...
32. New Lumberjack A lumberjack new to the job had trouble meeting his quota. He worked as hard as he could, but still he could only chop down two or three trees in a day. His supervisor noticed this, and asked what was wrong. Maybe his chainsaw was broken. The supervisor turned it on, but it was working […]...
33. Why you should learn to use algebra After applying some simple algebra to some trite phrases and cliches a new understanding can be reached of the secret to wealth and success. Here it goes. Knowledge is Power Time is Money and as every engineer knows, Power is Work over Time. So, substituting algebraic equations for these time worn bits of wisdom, we […]...
34. The Italian colonel had his brigade arrayed in full parade The Italian colonel had his brigade arrayed in full parade dress, proudly ready for inspection by the general. That worthy warrior strolled back and forth before the troops, and sniffed and stopped abruptly. “Colonel!” he spat out. “Yes, general!” the colonel quavered. “Your troops, your troops,” stormed the general. “They look very nice, they stand […]...
35. Значение идиомы face down [face down] {v. phr.} To get the upper hand over someone bybehaving forcefully; disconcert someone by the displaying of greatself-assurance. The night guard faced down the burglar by staringhim squarely in the face. Contrast: FACE UP....
36. The ages of man God created the mule, and told him, ‘you will be Mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and you lack intelligence. You will live for 50 years. The mule answered: ‘To live like this for 50 years is too much. Please, give me no more […]...
37. Christmas tree better Reasons Why a Christmas Tree Is Better Than a Woman” A Christmas tree doesn’t care how many other Christmas trees you have had in the past. A Christmas tree doesn’t care if you have an artificial one in the closet. When you are done with a Christmas tree you can throw it on the curb […]...
38. Значение идиомы save face [save face] {v. phr.} To save your good reputation, popularity, ordignity when something has happened or may happen to hurt you; hidesomething that may cause you shame. The policeman was caughtaccepting a bribe; he tried to save face by claiming it was money owedto him. Bill would not play in the game because he knew […]...
39. Перевод слова tree Tree – дерево Перевод слова To decorate a Christmas tree – наряжать елку to dig up a tree – выкопать дерево to fit a tree – подрубать дерево The car struck the Tree. Автомобиль врезался в дерево. Monkeys live in Trees. Обезьяны живут на деревьях. The Tree was about to fall. Дерево чуть не упало....
40. Irritating Co-workers Since our office reorganization, I’ve been sharing an office with Isabel. We’ve been Getting on each other’s nerves. Pete: Hey, Isabel, can you Cut that out? Isabel: Cut what out? I’m not doing anything. Pete: You’re tapping your pencil on your desk. It’s Driving me crazy. Isabel: Okay, I will if you’ll stop Slurping your […]...