Shopping with My Wife

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1. Shopping with My WifeOne thing I Dread more than anything else is going Clothes shopping with my wife. It’s not that I don’t like helping her buy new clothes. It’s just that I have no Fashion sense. My wife always asks me, “What do you think of this one?” and I always answer with something like: “That’s nice” ... Читать далее...
2. A wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified toA wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman. Just as the wife was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving along ... Читать далее...
3. The guide to wife translationsThe wife says: You want The wife means: You want The wife says: We need The wife means: I want The wife says: It’s your decision The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious The wife says: Do what you want The wife means: You’ll pay for this later The wife says: We need ... Читать далее...
4. TraditionsA man and a woman got married, and he told her : » since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for ... Читать далее...
5. A man says to his wifeA man says to his wife, «Get ready you, me & the dog are going fishing.» Wife says, «I dont want to go.» Man gives her 3 choices, fishing, blow job or take it up the a*se. Wife pick blow job. After she sucking for a while she says, «It tastes like sh*t. Man says, ... Читать далее...
6. Types of Shopping AreasSarah: Come on! We only have two more hours before the stores close and I want to make it to the Outlet stores. Aidan: I thought that when you asked if I wanted to spend the day together, you meant we’d go somewhere for lunch, go to a movie, or just Hang out. Sarah: Isn’t ... Читать далее...
7. Перевод слова dreadDread — ужас; бояться, страшиться Перевод слова Dread of light — светобоязнь to dread the coming winter — содрогаться при мысли о наступающей зиме I dread it is true — боюсь, что это правда She has a Dread of failure. Она боялась возможной неудачи. I Dread to think about what they might do next. Я ... Читать далее...
8. Shopping: a Must and a PleasureВ топике Шопинг: необходимость и удовольствие я делюсь своим мнением, что такое шопинг. Думаю, что есть покупки необходимые, а есть – для удовольствия. Если совместить оба эти понятия, то шопинг будет всегда приносить удовольствие. Для лучшего результата — возьмите с собой лучшую подругу или друга, рассматривайте витрины, планируйте будущие покупки, выпейте чашечку кофе в кафетерии ... Читать далее...
9. Перевод слова shoppingShopping — покупка товаров, шопинг Перевод слова Shopping street — торговая улица to do one’s shopping — делать покупки she’s out shopping — она пошла по магазинам I am just raring to go Shopping. Мне просто не терпится отправиться в поход по магазинам. I need to go shopping this Afternoon. Днем мне нужно сходить за ... Читать далее...
10. Types of Shopping AreasSarah: Come on! We only have two more hours before the stores close and I want to make it to the Outlet stores. Aidan: I thought that when you asked if I wanted to spend the day together, you meant we’d go somewhere for lunch, go to a movie, or just Hang out. Sarah: Isn’t ... Читать далее...
11. All of a sudden, the wife smacks her husbandAll of a sudden, the wife smacks her husband. The husband was totally dumfounded and asks, «What was that for?» Wife said, «Because, you are a bad fuck». Couple of minutes later, the husband smacks his wife. This time, the wife was confused and asked, «And may I ask what’s that about?» Husband said, » ... Читать далее...
12. The wife is not speaking to meOne night, this guy come into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. Then he asks for another. After a couple more drinks, the bartender gets worried. «What’s the matter?» the bartender asks. «My wife and I got into a fight,» explained the guy «and now she isn’t talking to me for a ... Читать далее...
13. A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wifeA concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, «Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things.» «Well,» the doctor replied, «go home and tonight stand about 15 feet from her and say ... Читать далее...
14. Значение идиомы shopping center[shopping center] {n.} A place usually for neighborhood shopping, where there is a group of stores and shops inside of a large parkinglot. There is a bowling alley at the nearest shopping center. All the stores in our shopping center stay open until nine o’clock onFriday evenings....
15. The 75 year old man and his young, knockout wifeThe 75 year old man and his young, knockout wife were shopping in an upscale jewelry boutique when the man’s oldest friend bumped into him. Eyeing the curvaceous blonde bending over the counter to try on a necklace, the friend asked «How in the hell did YOU land a wife like that?» The old man ... Читать далее...
16. Last Minute Holiday ShoppingEvery year, I tell myself that I won’t Procrastinate in doing my holiday shopping. And, every year, I End up with a shopping list As long as your arm And about 24 hours to get it all done. Waiting until the last minute means that I have to Brave the crowds out doing their Last-minute ... Читать далее...
17. Home ShoppingVictor: Turn off the TV and put down that phone. I know what you’re about to do. Julia: I wasn’t going to do anything. Victor: You’re watching the Home shopping channel and you have the phone in your hand, which means you’re about to call them and order something. Admit it. Julia: I just wanted ... Читать далее...
18. Shopping for UnderwearKerry: We’re almost done with the shopping. We just need some Underwear for you and some Unmentionables for me. Russell: It’s perfectly acceptable for women to buy men’s underwear, but do I have to go into the Lingerie store? All of the women in the store laugh at me. Kerry: No, they don’t. I just ... Читать далее...
19. Muzzammil Hassan gets 25 to life for beheading wife, Aasiya HassanA Buffalo man got 25 years to life Wednesday for beheading his wife in 2009. Muzzammil Hassan was convicted in February of the monstrous murder of his spouse, Aasiya Hassan. It took the jury less than an hour to find him guilty of second-degree murder. The life sentence was accompanied by an order of protection ... Читать далее...
20. A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each otherA Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window ... Читать далее...
21. A department storeA really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, «W-w-w-where’s the m-m-m-men’s dep-p-p-partment?» The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing. The man repeats himself: «W-w-w-where’s the m-m-m-men’s dep-p-p-partment?» Again, the clerk doesn’t answer him. The guy asks several more times: ... Читать далее...
22. Shopping for BeddingXavier: Thanks for helping me Decorate my new apartment. Hey, where are you going? Crystal: I’m going to the Bedding department. Now that you have a new bed, you’ll need new bedding. Xavier: Right, okay, but can’t I just get some Sheets, a couple of Pillows, and a Blanket? Crystal: That’s only the beginning. Oh, ... Читать далее...
23. Перевод слова wifeWife — жена Перевод слова To take to wife — взять в жены house-wife — домашняя хозяйка disloyal wife — неверная жена He split with his Wife. Он порвал со своей женой. He met his Wife at work. Он познакомился со своей женой на работе. My Wife never worked. Моя жена никогда не работала. Интересные ... Читать далее...
24. The wife of an older man is distraughtThe wife of an older man is distraught because her husband’s um… little sailor can’t salute anymore. She goes to her local doctor and explains the situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for her. The doc thinks for a little bit, turns to the woman and says, «listen, I don’t do this for ... Читать далее...
25. Шоппинг/ ShoppingНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Shopping Шоппинг My name is Lena. I live in Krasnodar. It’s the central city of our region and one of the biggest cities in Russia. There are lots of big and small shops in my city. When we need to buy something we go shopping. My parents go ... Читать далее...
26. Last Minute Holiday ShoppingEvery year, I tell myself that I won’t Procrastinate in doing my holiday shopping. And, every year, I End up with a shopping list As long as your arm And about 24 hours to get it all done. Waiting until the last minute means that I have to Brave the crowds out doing their Last-minute ... Читать далее...
27. Home ShoppingVictor: Turn off the TV and put down that phone. I know what you’re about to do. Julia: I wasn’t going to do anything. Victor: You’re watching the Home shopping channel and you have the phone in your hand, which means you’re about to call them and order something. Admit it. Julia: I just wanted ... Читать далее...
28. Shopping for UnderwearKerry: We’re almost done with the shopping. We just need some Underwear for you and some Unmentionables for me. Russell: It’s perfectly acceptable for women to buy men’s underwear, but do I have to go into the Lingerie store? All of the women in the store laugh at me. Kerry: No, they don’t. I just ... Читать далее...
29. ShoppingВ топике Шопинг я расскажу об истории великолепного магазина «Marks & Spencer» — самого популярного магазина в Великобритании, клиентами которого стали многие знаменитости. А также об истории и триумфе этого магазина во всем мире. Marks & Spencer торгует абсолютно всем, а его филиалы разбросаны по всему миру. Особенного внимания заслуживает Fresh food — сеть продуктовых ... Читать далее...
30. An old retired man goes to his wife one dayAn old retired man goes to his wife one day, and says to her, «I don’t know how to tell you this dear, but the stock market crashed, and I’m afraid we’re broke.» The wife says, «No, we’re not. Let’s go for a drive into town.» Husband replies, «Our savings are all gone and you ... Читать далее...
31. Olympic condomsA man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. When he arrives home, he tells his wife about the purchase he’s just made. «Olympic condoms?» she blurts, «What makes them so special?» «There are three colors,» he explains, «gold, silver and bronze.» «So what color ... Читать далее...
32. A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breastsA man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, «What are you doing?» She replies, «I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old.» The husband retorts, «Well, what did he say about your 50 year ... Читать далее...
33. Shopping for BeddingXavier: Thanks for helping me Decorate my new apartment. Hey, where are you going? Crystal: I’m going to the Bedding department. Now that you have a new bed, you’ll need new bedding. Xavier: Right, okay, but can’t I just get some Sheets, a couple of Pillows, and a Blanket? Crystal: That’s only the beginning. Oh, ... Читать далее...
34. A dog for a wifeIt was a dark, stormy, night. The Marine was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty. A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous young Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out «Sir, Good Evening, Sir!» The General, out for some relaxation, returned the salute ... Читать далее...
35. There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunkThere was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar. Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells, «ATTENTION ALL» and farts loudly. The wife is extremely embarrassed, and the husband looks at the drunk and says» Excuse me, you just farted before my wife.» The drunks replies,» I’m sorry I ... Читать далее...
36. Love thy NeighborThe middle-aged married couple finally moved into the Condo of their dreams, but right next door to a very sexy fashion model. The husband had taken to borrowing this or that from their neighbor and it seemed to the wife that it always took him way too long to return. One time the wife had ... Читать далее...
37. Not that my wife is the jealous type or anything, but one day at workNot that my wife’s the jealous type or anything, but one day at work, I had taken this temp who was filling in for my secretary to lunch in gratitude for an outstanding job on a very difficult project. As luck would have it, there was my wife waiting in the office for my return. ... Читать далее...
38. A man and wife entered aA man and wife entered a dentist’s office. The Wife said, «I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want gas or Novocain because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.» You’re a brave woman said the dentist. Now, show me which tooth it is. The wife turns to her ... Читать далее...
39. A man took his wife to the doctorsA man took his wife to the doctors. After a short examination the doctor said «Your wife’s mind has completely gone!» To which the man replied «I’m not surprised. She’s been giving a piece of it to me every day for the past 25 years!»...
40. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversaryA man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, «When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?» The husband replied, «All I wanted to do ... Читать далее...