Ralph and Charlie where playing the ninth hole at the local country club when Ralph hit his tee shot way to the right. Ralph walked over to the deep rough, found his ball, and proceeded to beat the hell out of wild buttercups with his pitching wedge. Mother Nature appeared and said, «Since you destroyed all of my favorite buttercups, if you ever taste butter, smell butter, or even think about butter you will become deathly ill and die.» Ralph walked out of the rough toward Charlie with a big smile on his face. Ralph then told him his story with a big grin on his face. Charlie says, «That’s not a good thing! Why are you smiling?» Ralph replies, «I almost hit the pussy willows.»
Упражнение на исчисляемые и неисчисляемые.
Сан-франциско по-английски.
Related topics:
- A man was playing a game of golfA man was playing a game of golf, and on hole 16, he hit the ball right into a field of buttercups. As honest a golfer as he normally was, he picked up the ball and laid it next to the flowerbed to avoid destroying the beautiful buttercups. A fairy comes down and says «thank ... Читать далее...
- A husband and wife were out playing golfA husband and wife were out playing golf. They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but in ... Читать далее...
- Charlie was playing with his little brother MickeyCharlie was playing with his little brother Mickey when the little boy asked whether he could fly like Superman. «Sure you can, Mickey,» Charlie said, «Just flap your arms really *really* hard.» So Mickey climbed up on the windowsill, started flapping like mad, jumped, then smashed into the ground six stories below. Horrified, their mother ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова ninthNinth — девятый Перевод слова Ninth part — девятая часть on the ninth of July — девятого июля he is doing it for the ninth time — он делает это в девятый раз He finished in Ninth place. Он пришел к финишу девятым. He made par on the Ninth hole. На девятой лунке он сделал ... Читать далее...
- The duffer muffed his tee shot into the woodsThe duffer muffed his tee shot into the woods, then hit into a few trees, then proceeded to hit across the fairway into another woods. Finally, after banging away several more times, he proceeded to hit into a sand trap. All the while, he’d noticed that the club professional had been watching. «What club should ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы square peg in a round hole[square peg in a round hole] {n.}, {informal} A person who does notfit into a job or position; someone who does not belong where he is. Arthur is a square peg in a round hole when he is playing ball. George likes to work with his hands. When it comes to books, he’s asquare peg ... Читать далее...
- A difficult golf gameRobert goes golfing every Saturday. One Saturday, he comes home three hours late. His wife asks him, «What took you so long?» The guy says, «That was the worst game of golf I’ve ever had. We got up to the first tee, and Charlie hit a hole-in-one and immediately dropped dead of a heart attack.» ... Читать далее...
- Bob stood over his tee short on the 18th holeBob stood over his tee short on the 18th hole for what seemed like forever. He’d waggle, look down, look up, but never start his backswing. Finally David, his playing partner, asked, «Why on Earth are you taking so long to make this shot?» «My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse, and ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова holeHole — дыра, отверстие, яма Перевод слова A hole in a roof — дыра в крыше to wear into holes — износить до дыр a hole in the fence — лазейка в ограде I have a Hole in my sock. У меня дырявый носок. The theory is full of Holes. Теория полна недостатков. The dog ... Читать далее...
- Charlie was in a bar and three babes came up andCharlie was in a bar and three babes came up and started hitting on him. He asked if they wanted to come over to his house later. They agreed to come over at after they went home and got ready. Charlie had a friend who worked in a drugstore, so he went to see him. ... Читать далее...
- A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadowA horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farm but the farmer can’t be found. So he drives the farmer’s ... Читать далее...
- The golf courseA man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on. He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, «I’m on the 7th hole, and you’re a hole behind me, so you ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы hole in one[hole in one] {n. phr.} A shot in golf that is hit from the tee andgoes right into the cup. Many golfers play for years before theyget a hole in one....
- Значение идиомы hole out[hole out] {v.} To finish play in golf by hitting the ball into thecup. The other players waited for Palmer to hole out before theyputted....
- Значение идиомы ace in the hole[ace in the hole] {n. phr.} 1. An ace given to a player face down so that other players in a card game cannot see it. When the cowboy bet all his money in the poker game he did not know that the gambler had an ace in the hole and would win it from ... Читать далее...
- When the old golfer died, Peter met him at the gates of heavenWhen the old golfer died, Peter met him at the gates of heaven. «Sorry, old man,» Peter said, «But I can’t let you in. You see the big book here says you committed one unpardonable sin back in 1978 — You took the Lord’s name in vain during a golf game.» «Oh, yes. I’ll never ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы in a hole[in a hole] or [in a spot] {adj. phr.}, {informal} In anembarrassing or difficult position; in some trouble. When therestaurant cook left at the beginning of the busy season, it put therestaurant owner in a hole. Compare: BEHIND THE EIGHT BALL, IN THEHOLE....
- Значение идиомы in the hole[in the hole] {adv.} or {adj. phr.}, {informal} 1a. Having a scorelower than zero in a game, especially a card game; to a score belowzero. John went three points in the hole on the first hand of thecard game. 1b. Behind an opponent; in difficulty in a sport or game. We had their pitcher in ... Читать далее...
- How is that dentistA couple of old guys were golfing when one said he was going to Dr. Taylor for a new set of dentures in the morning. His friend remarked that he had gone to the same dentist a few years before. «Is that so?» the first said. «Did he do a good job?» «Well, I was ... Читать далее...
- One day Mongo is in his back yard digging a holeOne day Mongo is in his back yard digging a hole. His neighbor, seeing him there, decides to investigate. «Whatcha doin?» he asked. Mongo replies, «My goldfish died and I’m burying him.» «That’s an awful big hole for a goldfish, ain’t it?» asked the neighbor. Mongo shot back, «That’s because he’s inside your fuckin’ cat!’...
- A golfer hit his drive on the first holeA golfer hit his drive on the first hole 300 yards right down the middle. When it came down, however, it hit a sprinkler and the ball went sideways into the woods. He was angry, but he went into the woods and hit a very hard 2 iron which hit a tree and bounced back ... Читать далее...
- A game of golfA man walked into the clubhouse and noticed a friend sitting in a corner wearing a neck brace. He sat down and asked his mate what happened. «Well, I was playing golf and I hit my ball into the rough,» replied his friend. «Then I met a chick who was looking for her ball too. ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы out of the hole[out of the hole] {adv.} or {adj. phr.}, {informal} 1a. With ascore better than zero in a game; especially a card game, to a scoreabove zero. It took us a long time to get out of the hole in thecard game. 1b. Even with an opponent after being behind; out oftrouble in a sport or ... Читать далее...
- Farmer John had just walked into the local watering holeFarmer John had just walked into the local watering hole, when who should he see, but his old friend Chris the tractor salesman sitting up at the bar. Chris looked so down and dejected, that John just had to go up and say something to him. «Say, Chris, how ya doing? How’s the tractor selling ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы hole up[hole up] also [hole in] {v.}, {slang} To take refuge or shelter;put up; lodge. After a day’s motoring, Harry found a room for rentand holed up for the night. The thief holed up at an abandonedfarm. «Let’s hole in,» said Father as we came to a motel thatlooked good....
- Значение идиомы hole-in-the-wall[hole-in-the-wall] {n. phr.} A small place to live, stay in, orwork in; a small, hidden, or inferior place. The jewelry storeoccupied a tiny hole-in-the-wall. When Mr. and Mrs. Green werefirst married, they lived in a little hole-in-fhe-wall in a cheapapartment building. 2. {slang}, {citizen’s band radio jargon}. Atunnel. Let’s get through this hole in the ... Читать далее...
- Once the club duffer challenged the local golf proOnce the club duffer challenged the local golf pro to a match, with a $100 bet on the side. «But,» said the duffer, «since you’re obviously much better than I, to even it a bit you have to spot me two’gotchas’.» The golf pro didn’t know what a ‘gotcha’ was, but he went along with ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы burn a hole in one’s pocket[burn a hole in one’s pocket] {v. phr.} To make you want to buy something; be likely to be quickly spent. Money burns a hole in Linda’s pocket. The silver dollar that Don got for his birthday was burning a hole in his pocket, and Don hurried to a dime store....
- Golf lessonsA husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them are playing like they want to, so they decide to take private lessons. The husband has his lesson first. After the pro sees his swing, he says, «No no, no, you’re gripping the club way too hard!» «Well, what should I do?» asks ... Читать далее...
- Charlie Sheen Once Bought 2,600+ Outfield Seats At An Angels’ Game Because He Wanted To Catch A Home Run BallCharlie Sheen has been making a bit of news this week with outlandish comments on TV and radio appearances, but his bizarre behavior is nothing new. In 1996, Sports Illustrated included a blurb in its «Scorecard» section that described Sheen’s trip to a California Angels game. Apparently, Sheen was determined to catch a home run ... Читать далее...
- Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranchCowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church. «When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral,» Joe began. «You mean the parking lot,» interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow. «I walked up the trail to the door,» Joe ... Читать далее...
- Playing tablaOnce a couple were on vacation. The husband was lying on the beach facing downwards on his stomach & the wife was patting him on his butt. He happened to ask her what she was doing, she said «I’m playing the Tabla» He turned around & told her «Alright now you can start playing the ... Читать далее...
- JOHN F. KENNEDY: The Swingingest President EverJ. F. K., a gifted golfer, didn’t want to be photographed on the links. He was afraid of inheriting Eisenhower’s image, as a man putting his way through is presidency. An aficionado of Ian Fleming’s spy novels, John F. Kennedy relished keeping secrets almost as much as he enjoyed hearing them. One of Kennedy’s most ... Читать далее...
- Значение идиомы like a hole in the head[like a hole in the head] {adv. phr.} Not at all; scarcely;grudgingly; in an unwelcome manner. Joan needs her mother-in-law tostay with her for a week like a hole in the head....
- Значение идиомы watering hole[watering hole] or [place] {n. phr.} A bar, pub, or nightclub wherepeople gather to drink and socialize. I like «The Silver Dollar» — it is my favorite watering hole in all of Sidney, Nebraska....
- Heated passionsMike and Keith are playing golf one hot Sunday afternoon. While approaching the sixteenth hole, they notice an old golfer teeing up by himself. The two friends stop and wait for the older golfer to finish his hole. After the old man drives the ball a considerable distance down the fairway, he collapses on the ... Читать далее...
- Golf in the BedroomGolf in the Bedroom Rules of Play Each player shall provide his own equipment — normally one club and two balls. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out of the hole. ... Читать далее...
- Picking up a Rental CarRalph: I have a Reservation for a car. Clerk: What is the last name on the reservation? Ralph: It’s Furcal. Clerk: Just one moment. I have a reservation for Ralph Furcal, picking up today and returning on the 19th. Ralph: Yes, that’s right. I reserved an Economy car. Clerk: We do have an economy car ... Читать далее...
- A blonde walked into a doctor’s office with a hole in her handA blonde walked into a doctor’s office with a hole in her hand. The doctor told her that he had to report all gunshot wounds, and this was an obvious gunshot wound, so would she please explain how it happened? The blonde said, «Well, to be honest with you, I was trying to commit suicide, ... Читать далее...
- Six guys were playing poker when Smith losesSix guys were playing poker when Smith loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up. Roberts looks around and asks, «Now, who is going to tell the wife?» They draw straws. Rippington, who ... Читать далее...
Ralph and Charlie where playing the ninth hole at