Problems during flight

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1. Find out about the catThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A chauffeur worked for a woman who took her cat with her on rides. During one trip, the driver droped her at a mall before he gasing up. The cat remained in ... Читать далее...
2. This dog loves peopleThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A normally sweet Great Dane Psil has one quirk: she hates United Parcel Service drivers. While walk Psil one day, around the corner of a house came a UPS man. Struggling to ... Читать далее...
3. Choking a girlfriendThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Sunday, November 29, 1992 The Ontario Press Council dismissed a complaint filed by Allan Sorensen against the Toronto Sun, which had reported that Sorenson had choked his ex-girlfriend. Sorensen’s complaint was that ... Читать далее...
4. Appear on televisionThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Wednesday, October 21, 1992 In July, Danny Fouts and his wife and her sister, in New York City to appear on the «Sally Jessy Raphael» show to discuss their arrest for shoplifting ... Читать далее...
5. Set up hidden camerasThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. December 18, 1992 Michael J. Schmidt, 29, set up a hidden video camera at his home near Superior, Wis., because he had been burglarized several times and thought he could catch the ... Читать далее...
6. Insulting to womenThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Bangkok, Thailand A member of the ruling junta who oversees Thai Airways International has ordered the carrier to hire more-attractive stewardesses. «We have received a lot of complaints that our air hostesses ... Читать далее...
7. Annoying phone callsThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A co-worker of mine fielded phone calls from his Alumni Association every three months for about five years, ostensibly checking to see that his records were up to date, and coincidentally asking ... Читать далее...
8. Ordering fast foodThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. One night, a few co-workers at the computer data centre where I work stayed late and we all started to get hungry. We decided to order in food by phone, but our ... Читать далее...
9. Beware of drunken bearsThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. LOS ANGELES TIMES, October 8: People of northwestern Montana have been advised to be on the lookout for drunken bears. Black bears and grizzlies have been congregating along the tracks of the ... Читать далее...
10. Bull free in TokoyoThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Tokyo, Japan: A bull bound for slaughter gave its handlers the slip Wednesday and escaped into Tokyo’s teeming streets. The 1,300-pound bull, shipped in from southern Japan, thundered down the gangplank as ... Читать далее...
11. Newspaper typing errorThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. The following appeared on the back page of one of Australia’s more outrageous computer publications, «Computing Australia», 21st Sept 1987: … Blame it on the computer. An unfriendly computer has been held ... Читать далее...
12. Drinking and drivingThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. The «Environmental Engineering News» published some rather sobering information about punishment for drunk driving convictions in other countries. In Australia, the names of drunk drivers are printed in newspapers under the caption, ... Читать далее...
13. Strange headline newsThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A bird dropped a snake over a California power station, short-circuiting a line and causing a two-hour blackout. — — — — — — — — — — — — — — ... Читать далее...
14. Getting In-Flight ServiceI pushed the Call button to get the attention of the Flight attendant. Flight attendant: Yes? What can I do for you? Hal: It’s very cold in the Cabin. Is it possible to get a Blanket? Flight attendant: We’re out of blankets, but here’s a Pillow. Hal: Okay, thanks. I was asleep during the Meal ... Читать далее...
15. Перевод слова flightFlight — полет, перелет, рейс Перевод слова The flight of a bee — полет пчелы flight took two hours — перелет продолжался два часа Flight 447 is ready to leave — заканчивается посадка на самолет, вылетающий рейсом 447 Our Flight was very smooth. Наш полет прошел совершенно гладко. Our Flight departs at 6:15 a. m. ... Читать далее...
16. Wait-Listed for a FlightI can’t believe I made it into San Francisco, At long last! This morning, I went to the airport to Catch my 10 a. m. Flight. I got there early to go through Security. The folks at the TSA can really slow things down sometimes. Since I had an Electronic ticket, I didn’t have to ... Читать далее...
17. Two guys are driving through Texas whenTwo guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver says, «Why’d you do that? The trooper says, «You’re in ... Читать далее...
18. Talking on a planeThe following is supposedly a true story relating to an actual event that took place during a flight. As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. «Coming up on the right, you can ... Читать далее...
19. Phone keeps ringingThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Phone Won’t Stop Ringing? Here’s What You Do Leola Starling of Ribrock, Tenn., had a serious telephone problem. But unlike most people she did something about it. The brand-new $10 million Ribrock ... Читать далее...
20. HappensFor all of you out there who’ve had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. It’s a classic! In tribute to those ‘special’ customers we all love! An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with ... Читать далее...
21. Air Canada flight finds stranded Australian yachtThey were ready to land in Australia, at the end of a 14-hour international flight, when the 270 passengers of an Air Canada flight were suddenly thrown into a high-seas search-and-rescue operation. Flight AC033 diverted after pilot Andrew Robertson got a call from the Australian Maritime Safety Authority on Tuesday to help search for a ... Читать далее...
22. A man is walking past this house when a used condomA man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and lands squarely on his head. Rather disgusted and absolutely furious, he goes up to the front door and starts pounding on it. An elderly man opens it and asks him what caused him to knock ... Читать далее...
23. Flight attendantВ топике Стюардесса я делюсь своей мечтой – стать стюардессой. Эта профессия привлекает меня потому, что я смогу посмотреть новые страны и познакомиться с людьми разных национальностей. Для того чтобы стать стюардессой, нужно хорошо знать английский язык. Кроме того, стюардесса должна быть всегда доброжелательна и вежлива с пассажирами, уметь подать еду и напитки и еще ... Читать далее...
24. Перевод слова storyStory — рассказ, повесть, сюжет Перевод слова Short story — рассказ, новелла funny story — анекдот the main thing in a novel is the story — самое главное в романе — это сюжет His Story rings true. Его рассказ звучит правдоподобно. He told us the Story. Он рассказал нам эту историю. I accredited his Story. ... Читать далее...
25. Перевод слова passengerPassenger — пассажир Перевод слова Passenger liner — пассажирский лайнер first-class passenger — пассажир первого класса tourist-class passenger — пассажир туристического класса transit passenger — транзитный пассажир Neither the driver nor the Passengers were hurt. Ни водитель, ни пассажиры не были травмированы. Passengers for the next flight should go to the last gate. Пассажиры, улетающие ... Читать далее...
26. Legal ProblemsI was reading the newspaper this morning and saw a story about a university student Arrested and Charged with Burglary and Assault. Last Monday, this student hit a Security guard over the head, Broke into his professor’s office, and Stole the professor’s computer. He wasn’t doing well in the class and thought that he could ... Читать далее...
27. Just before takeoff one day, a flight attendantJust before takeoff one day, a flight attendant approached Muhammad Ali and asked that he fasten his seat belt. «Superman don’t need no seat belt,» Ali growled. «Well, Superman,» the stewardess replied, «don’t need no airplane!»...
28. Murphy’s Travel LawsMurphy Laws For Frequent Flyers No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight. If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal. If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed. ... Читать далее...
29. A businessman boards a flight66.A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices that she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies, «This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It identifies that American ... Читать далее...
30. During a recent publicity outingDuring a recent publicity outing, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. «There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die ... Читать далее...
31. Диалог на английском языке с переводом «Регистрация на рейс в аэропорту» (Checking in for a flight)— Next in line, please… Are you checking in, sir? — Yes, please. — What’s your destination? — It’s Venice, Italy. A connecting flight through Rome. Is the departure still at 9.15? — Yes, it is. Everything is on time today. Can I have your ticket and passport, sir? — Here you are. — Are ... Читать далее...
32. Cow on Train TracksA passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. «What’s going on?» she yells out the window. «Cow on the track!» replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees ... Читать далее...
33. Airport AnnouncementsI was walking through the airport to Gate 11 to catch my flight when I heard this announcement: “Attention passengers on English Air flight 232 to Boise. The Departure gate Has been changed. The flight will now be leaving from Gate 26.” That was my flight! I looked at the Flight information monitors, turned around, ... Читать далее...
34. Orgasmic ProblemsThe husband, tired of a listless sex life came right out and asked his wife during a recent love-making session, «How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?» She looked him rite in the eye and said, «You’re never home!»...
35. Перевод слова funnyFunny — забавный, смешной, странный Перевод слова Funny story — анекдот, смешная история extremely funny — чрезвычайно смешной, уморительный funny face — забавный вид That’s one Funny boy. Он очень забавный. What’s that Funny smell? Что за странный запах? I see this as diabolically Funny. По-моему, это ужасно смешно....
36. Перевод слова surprisingSurprising — удивительный, неожиданный Перевод слова Rather surprising result — довольно неожиданный результат this is scarcely surprising — этому едва ли можно удивляться the surprising thing is that — удивительно, что That news is hardly Surprising. Вряд ли это неожиданная новость. The austerity of their lifestyle was Surprising. Аскетизм их образа жизни был поразительным. With ... Читать далее...
37. A veterinarian surgeonA veterinarian surgeon had had a hell of a day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner, after which they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, ... Читать далее...
38. Talking About MoviesMartin: What did you think of that movie? Joanna: It was okay, but I’m not really into Big-budget movies with a lot of Special effects and Big-name stars. Martin: Oh, you’re a film Snob. I bet you only watch Indie films made on a Shoestring budget with low Production values. Joanna: No, that’s not true. ... Читать далее...
39. A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulderA taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, «Look mate, don’t ever ... Читать далее...
40. A plane was taking off from Kennedy AirportA plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, «Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth ... Читать далее...