One night the Norse god Thor was feeling a bit horny

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1. A salesman in a strange city was feeling hornyA salesman in a strange city was feeling horny and wanted release. He inquired for the address of a good house of ill repute. He was told to go to 225 West 42nd St. By mistake, he went to 255 West 42nd St, the office of a podiatrist. Being met by a beautiful woman in ... Читать далее...
2. The horny midget found that the best wayThe horny midget found that the best way to make time with women was to be direct about it. So he went up to the tallest blondest woman at the party and said,»Hey, honey, whaddaya say to a little fuck?» She looked down at him and promptly replied, «Hello, you little fuck!»...
3. Перевод слова feelingFeeling — чувство, ощущение Перевод слова Feeling of safety — чувство безопасности a sense of feeling — чувство осязания a man of feeling — сентиментальный или эмоциональный человек I was Feeling rotten. Я чувствовал себя просто отвратительно. I am Feeling quite off today. Мне сегодня нездоровится. I have a bad Feeling about this. У меня ... Читать далее...
4. A horny young man went to a brothelA horny young man went to a brothel… The lady at the counter asked him what his choice would be. The man wanted to know what was available. Madam, «On the first floor, we have the ex-models… they are all slinky and sexy… On the second floor, we have our ex-actresses…they are all buxom and ... Читать далее...
5. Jim will not be in today. He is not feeling himself. Thank you«Jim will not be in today. He is not feeling himself. Thank you.» THIS MEANS: 1. He doesn’t feel the way he usually does. 2. He is not in complete control of his hands. 3. His emotions are shattered. 4. His skin is numb. 5. He has transofrmed into an alter-ego (i. e. professional wrestler) ... Читать далее...
6. One night, an 87-year-old womanOne night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman. Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their apartment, killing him instantly. When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to ... Читать далее...
7. Little Gregory wakes up in the middle of the nightLittle Gregory wakes up in the middle of the night feeling alone and scared. He goes into his mother’s room for comfort and he sees his mom standing naked in front of the mirror. She is rubbing her chest and groaning, «I want a man, I want a man.» Shaking his head in bewilderment, Gregory ... Читать далее...
8. Значение идиомы day and night[day and night] or [night and day] {adv.} 1. For days without stopping; continually. Syn.: AROUND THE CLOCK. Some filling stations on great highways are open day and night 365 days a year. The three men took turns driving the truck, and they drove night and day for three days. 2. Every day and every ... Читать далее...
9. Перевод идиомы have a feeling about something, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: have a feeling about something Перевод: казаться, находиться под впечатлением о чем-либо Пример: I have a strange feeling about the new man in our company. У меня странное впечатление о новом человеке в нашей компании....
10. This woman has her bridge club every Thursday nightThis woman has her bridge club every Thursday night and after a peaceful game or two with the ladies, she goes home to fix her husband dinner when he gets home from work. Well, one Thursday, she’s playing a great game and she has an incredible hand when she notices the time. «Oh, no! I ... Читать далее...
11. Значение идиомы hard feeling[hard feeling] {n.} Angry or bitter feeling; enmity. — Usually usedin the plural. Jim asked Andy to shake hands with him, just to showthat there were no hard feelings. Bob and George once quarreledover a girl, and there are still hard feelings between them....
12. Перевод слова nightNight — ночь Перевод слова A blusterous windy night — штормовая ветреная ночь a clear night — ясная, звездная ночь the cope of night — покров ночи day and night — круглосуточно He’s on Night duty. Он на ночном дежурстве. It poured all Night. Ливень шел всю ночь. He yawned good Night. Он, зевая, произнес: ... Читать далее...
13. Перевод идиомы the small hours (of the night / morning) / the wee hours (of the night / morning), значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: the small hours (of the night / morning) / the wee hours (of the night / morning) Перевод: рассвет или время перед рассветом; часы после полуночи Пример: My father likes to read the newspaper in the small hours of the night. Моему отцу нравится читать газеты по ночам....
14. A farmer and his wife were laying in bed one nightA farmer and his wife were laying in bed one night, the farmer feeling a little frisky, reaches over and gives his wife’s breast a little feel and says,»Mother, if this could give milk, we could get rid of the cow.» His hand then travels down to her crotch, and he says, «Mother, if this ... Читать далее...
15. Mr. Horntoot admitted to his wife that he was feelingMr. Horntoot admitted to his wife that he was feeling much better since his operation, but couldn’t account for the enormous bump on the back of his head. «Oh, that,» chuckled Mrs. Horntoot. «Just before your operation they suddenly ran out of ether!»...
16. Перевод слова shapeShape — форма, очертание, образ Перевод слова Rectangular in shape — прямоугольной формы in the shape of a horseshoe — в виде подковы an angel in the shape of a woman — воплощенный ангел (о женщине) The dress was Shaped to her figure. Платье подогнали по ее фигуре. What Shape is the table? Какой формы ... Читать далее...
17. Значение идиомы night owl[night owl] {n. phr.} One who sleeps during the day and stays up orworks during the night. Tom hardly ever sleeps at night; he prefersto work by lamp light and has become a regular night owl. Compare:GRAVEYARD SHIFT....
18. A young girl had not been feeling wellA young girl had not been feeling well and went to her family doctor. «Young lady,» the doctor began, «you’re pregnant.» «But that can’t be. The only men I’ve been with are nudists and in, our colony we practice sex only with our eyes.» «Well my dear,» said the doctor, «someone in that colony is ... Читать далее...
19. A man goes into the doctor’s office feeling really badA man goes into the doctor’s office feeling really bad. After a thorough examination the doctor calls him into his office and says «I have some bad news. You have HAGS.» «What is HAGS» the man asks. «It’s herpes, AIDS, gonorrhea, and syphilis» says the doctor. «Oh my God» says the man. «What are you ... Читать далее...
20. An ant and an elephant share a night of romanceAn ant and an elephant share a night of romance. Next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. «Damn», says the ant, «one night of passion and I spend the rest of my life digging a grave!»...
21. Перевод слова satisfySatisfy — удовлетворять, доставлять удовльствие Перевод слова To satisfy one’s wants — удовлетворить свои потребности nothing satisfies him — ему ничем не угодишь this piece of work does not satisfy me — я недоволен этой работой to satisfy a desire — удовлетворять желание I am not Satisfied with your work. Я не доволен твоей работой. ... Читать далее...
22. Feeling HomesickAnnie: Why the Long face? Luis: I don’t know. I guess I’m feeling a little Homesick. Annie: I thought you got over that. I know the Adjustment was hard when you first got here, but I thought you were Coping pretty well. Luis: I was. It’s just that the holidays are coming up and I ... Читать далее...
23. An elderly couple, still very loving after all these yearsAn elderly couple, still very loving after all these years, is shocked when the woman’s doctor says she has a heart condition that could kill her at any time. She is to avoid stress, eat right, and never, ever have sex again — the strain would be too much. The couple reluctantly try to live ... Читать далее...
24. After spending a night at a hotel with a prostituteAfter spending a night at a hotel with a prostitute, the politician took $300 out of his wallet and placed it on the dressing table. «Thanks,» she said. «But I only charge $20.» «Twenty bucks for the entire night?» the amazed MP replied. «You can’t make a living on that.» «Oh, don’t worry,» the whore ... Читать далее...
25. Out All Night DrinkingAn Irishman’s been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he’ll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside he stands up and falls flat ... Читать далее...
26. Значение идиомы good night[good night] {interj.} 1. Used as a polite phrase when you leavesomeone at night. «Good night!» said Bob as he left Dick’s houseafter the party. «I’ll see you in the morning.» Bill said goodnight to his parents and went upstairs to bed. 2. or [good grief] — Used to show surprise and often some fear ... Читать далее...
27. On their first night to be togetherOn their first night to be together, the newly wed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom, all showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The proud husband says, «my dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.» The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished. ... Читать далее...
28. Значение идиомы one-night stand[one-night stand] {n. phr.} 1. A single performance given by atraveling company while on a tour. After they went bankrupt in thebig cities, the traveling jazz quartet played one-night stands in thecountry. 2. A brief affair or sexual encounter. «With AIDS allaround us?» said Jane. «Nobody is having one-night stands anymore.»...
29. Значение идиомы night letter[night letter] {n.} A telegram sent at night at a cheaper rate anddelivered in the morning. I waited until after six o’clock in theevening before sending the telegram home because I can say more forthe same price in a night letter....
30. Перевод идиомы night owl, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: night owl Перевод: сова; человек, которому нравится поздно ложиться Пример: My friend is a night owl and stays up late every night. Мой друг — сова, и каждую ночь он сидит допоздна....
31. Down in Florida, two widows were talking and one askedDown in Florida, two widows were talking and one asked the other, «Do you ever get to feeling horny?» «Yes,» her friend replied. «What do you do about it?» «I usually suck on a Lifesaver.» After a moment of stunned silence her friend asked, «Well, what beach do you go to?»...
32. On a very cold nightOn a very cold night, a young man dropped into the local brothel and the madam said, «You’ll have to wait.» «But there’s lots of girls that aren’t busy right now.» «Yes, but several of the rooms are closed for repairs.» «Listen, I’m pretty desperate. I don’t need a room.» So she takes his money ... Читать далее...
33. A perfect choiceA woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up. Her first husband beat her, and her second husband ran away with another woman. Plus, she couldn’t find a new lover who could satisfy her sexually, so she put an ad in the classifieds: Wanted: A good looking, single guy who won’t ... Читать далее...
34. Перевод идиомы a hen night / a hen party, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: a hen night / a hen party Идиома: a hen night / a hen party Перевод: девичник, женская компания Пример: Jenny’s having her hen night a week before the wedding. Дженни устраивает девичник за неделю до свадьбы....
35. Значение идиомы fly-by-night[fly-by-night ] {adj.} Set up to make a lot of money in a hurry, then disappear so people can’t find you to complain about poor work, etc.; not trustworthy; not reliable. Mrs. Blank bought her vacuumcleaner from a new company; when she tried to have it fixed, she foundit was a fly-by-night business....
36. Значение идиомы call it a night[call it a night] {v. phr.} To declare that an evening party or other activity conducted late in the day is finished. I am so tired that I am going to call it a night and go to bed....
37. Значение идиомы make a night of it[make a night of it] {v. phr.}, {informal} To spend the whole nightat an activity. The dog found the door unlatched and made a nightof it. The boys and girls at the dance made a night of it. Compare: MAKE A DAY OF IT....
38. Feeling DisillusionedDaniela: I did it. I finally met Mandy Timpkin. Tony: Mandy Timpkin, your Idol? Daniela: Yeah, I stood in line for two days at her Book signing and finally met her. It was a big Disappointment. Tony: Really? I thought she Could do no wrong, As far as you’re concerned. Daniela: Well, that was before ... Читать далее...
39. Перевод идиомы far into the night, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: far into the night Перевод: глубокая ночь, поздняя ночь Пример: I studied far into the night because I had a big test the next day. Я занимался до глубокой ночи, потому что на следующий день у меня была большая проверочная....
40. A widow was feeling rather lonelyA widow was feeling rather lonely and decided that the best thing for her would be to have a companion. So, off she went to the pet shop. She wasn’t sure just what kind of pet she’d like, so she figured she’d just walk around until she found just the ‘right one.’ She went past ... Читать далее...