Expresso and a syringe

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1. Constantly complainingA customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour., Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth ... Читать далее...
2. A delicacyAn American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following a day of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, «What is that you just served?» The waiter replied, » ... Читать далее...
3. Значение идиомы strung out[strung out] {adj.}, {slang}, {colloquial} 1. Nervous, jittery, jumpy; generally ill because of drug use or withdrawal symptoms. The only explanation I can think of for Max’s behavior is that hemust be strung out. 2. To suffer because of a lack of somethingpreviously accustomed to, such as the love and affection of someone. Sue is ... Читать далее...
4. Finding a Chinese JewSid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. «Sid,» asked Al, «are there any Jews in China?» «I don’t know,» Sid replied. «Why don’t we ask the waiter?» When the waiter came by, Al asked him, «Are there any Chinese Jews?» «I don’t know sir, let me ask,» the waiter replied, and he went ... Читать далее...
5. George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DCGeorge W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order. «I’ll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil,» answers the President. «But sir, what about the mad cow?!!» asks the waiter. «Oh,» answers Dubya, «she’ll order for herself.»...
6. Dining at a Restaurant II (Fast)I love coming to this Italian restaurant. The appetizers and desserts are To die for. When the waiter came to our table To take our order, my friend ordered a lobster ravioli dish, and I ordered my favorite, lasagna. The waiter then asked us, «Would you like a Soup or salad with that?» My friend ... Читать далее...
7. A stuffy matron is with a new man in a top restaurantA stuffy matron is with a new man in a top restaurant. The onion soup gets to her, and as the waiter is serving the main dishes she lets loose a bombastic fart. Trying to save face, she says to the waiter: «Sir! Please stop that immediately.» «Certainly, madame,» replies the waiter with a bow, ... Читать далее...
8. Перевод слова waiterWaiter — официант Перевод слова Call the waiter over — подозвать официанта deft waiter — расторопный официант leave a gratuity for the waiter — оставить официанту на чай Has the Waiter taken your order? Официант принял ваш заказ? He took a job as a Waiter. Он устроился на работу в качестве официанта. Did you tip ... Читать далее...
9. A Problem with a Restaurant CheckI waved my hand To get the waiter’s attention. Waiter: Yes? Leslie: The Check, please. Waiter: Would you like any Dessert, or some tea or coffee? Leslie: No, just the check. Thanks. Waiter: Here you are. I’ll Ring that up for you when you’re ready. Leslie: Thank you. Oh, there seems to be a Mistake ... Читать далее...
10. Spain JokesSpanish dining An American tourist goes into a restaurant in Spain and orders the specialty of the house. When his dinner arrives, he asks the waiter what it is. «These, senor,» replied the waiter in broken English, «are the arms of the bull killed in the ring today.» The tourist swallowed hard but tasted the ... Читать далее...
11. The Microsoft waiterPatron: Waiter! Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I’ll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem? Patron: There’s a fly in my soup! Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time. Patron: No, it’s still there. Waiter: Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup; try eating it ... Читать далее...
12. Discovering too late that aDiscovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to a luncheon meeting of local ministers, the restaurant’s owner waited nervously for the clerics’ reaction. «Quick, man,» he whispered to the waiter, «what did they say?» «Nothing,» replied the waiter. «They were all too busy slipping the seeds into their pockets.»...
13. Dining at a Restaurant I (Fast)Well, I love going out to restaurants to eat. One of the best experiences I’ve had recently was at a place here in Los Angeles called Il Fornaio. It’s an Italian restaurant in a very nice part of Beverly Hills. I don’t go there very often-I can’t really afford it, but every once in a ... Читать далее...
14. A panda bear walks into a restaurantA panda bear walks into a restaurant. He orders the special and eats it. After eating, he pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter and starts to walk out the door. The owner of the restaurant says, «Hey, what are you doing? You come in here, you kill my waiter and walk away without saying ... Читать далее...
15. A man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open tableA man entered a restaurant and sat at the only open table. As he sat down, he knocked the spoon off the table with his elbow. A nearby waiter reached into his shirt pocket, pulled out a clean spoon, and set it on the table. The diner was impressed, and asked, «Do all the waiters ... Читать далее...
16. Значение идиомы straight face[straight face] {n.} A face that is not laughing or smiling. Mary told all the funny stories she knew to try to make Joan laugh, but Joan kept a straight face. It is hard to tell when Jim isteasing you. He can tell a fib with a straight face. When Bob fellinto the water, he ... Читать далее...
17. Bill and Hillary are at a restaurantBill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight’s special is chicken almondine and fresh fish. The chicken sounds good, I’ll have that,» Hillary says. The waiter nods. And the vegetable?» he asks. Oh, He’ll have the fish,» Hillary replies....
18. Значение идиомы sling hash[sling hash] {v.}, {slang} To serve food, especially in a cheap, small diner, a drive-in, or short-order restaurant. Jake got a jobslinging hash at the new drive-in restaurant. Jody earned moneyfor college by slinging hash in a restaurant during the summer. Compare: SHORT-ORDER COOK....
19. Перевод слова lackLack — отсутствие, нехватка Перевод слова Lack of money — недостаток денег lack of judgement — неумение разобраться to lack decision — быть нерешительным lack of demand — недостаток спроса You shall never Lack for money while I am alive. Пока я жив, у тебя никогда не будет недостатка в деньгах. This soup Lacks salt. ... Читать далее...
20. Using Caffeine as a StimulantJoan: Hi, how are you? What are you doing? What is this? Roberto: Whoa! You’re very High-strung this morning. Joan: Am I? I am a little Wired. I’ve been Up all night trying to finish an assignment for one of my classes. Roberto: You don’t seem tired at all for having been up all night. ... Читать далее...
21. A customer walks into a restaurant and noticesA customer walks into a restaurant and notices a large sign on the wall that says, «$500 if we fail to fill your order.» When his waitress arrives, he orders elephant tail on rye. She calmly writes down his order and walks into the kitchen. Almost immediately he hears an explosion of voices. The restaurant ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы sleep on[sleep on] {v.} To postpone a decision about. We asked Judy ifshe would join our club and she answered that she would sleep on it. We will have to sleep on your invitation until we know whether wewill be free Monday night....
23. Really torrid honeymoonAfter the third day of a really torrid honeymoon, the young couple finally emerged from their room and walked into the hotel restaurant. After they were seated, the waiter came over to get their orders. The new husband looked at his bride and said, «You know what I really feel like honey?» «Well sure,» she ... Читать далее...
24. Упражнения «Неопределенный артикль» (с ответами)1. Поставьте неопределенный артикль там, где необходимо. Diana went up to young girl and asked: “Is there Italian restaurant near here?” She thought for moment and said: “Yes, there is one. Just go straight ahead 200 metres. You’ll see it in old building, opposite Chinese restaurant.” Diana went inside and saw man playing the piano. ... Читать далее...
25. Значение идиомы string out[string out] {v.} To make extend over a great distanceor a long stretch of time. The telephone poles were strung outalong the road as far as we could see. Mary and Ann did not havemuch to say but they did not want to go home. They strung out theirgossip for a long time....
26. Punishment that fits the crimeThree dogs are sitting in the waiting room of a vets office. One is a poodle, one is a schnauzer and the other is a great Dane. The poodle turns to the schnauzer and asks «why are you here?» The schnauzer responds, «I’m 17 years old. I don’t see or hear very well. I’ve been ... Читать далее...
27. Eating Fast FoodMy friend Julia called me The other day. She wanted to Grab some lunch and asked me if I wanted to go to the local Fast food place down the street. I said sure, even though I knew it wouldn’t be good for me. I Hopped in my car and Swung by to pick her ... Читать далее...
28. A lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy manA lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer. The farmer said, «There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep, one of you must sleep in the barn.» «No problem,» ... Читать далее...
29. This dog loves peopleThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A normally sweet Great Dane Psil has one quirk: she hates United Parcel Service drivers. While walk Psil one day, around the corner of a house came a UPS man. Struggling to ... Читать далее...
30. Two nuns go to a restaurant to have dinnerTwo nuns go to a restaurant to have dinner. They notice Rocky Mountain Oysters on the menu and wondered what that was. They ask the waiter who replies «Oh Sister, those are nuts.» She answers «Do you mean like the kind you crack with a rock?» «No. The kind you rock on a crack.»...
31. Перевод слова funnyFunny — забавный, смешной, странный Перевод слова Funny story — анекдот, смешная история extremely funny — чрезвычайно смешной, уморительный funny face — забавный вид That’s one Funny boy. Он очень забавный. What’s that Funny smell? Что за странный запах? I see this as diabolically Funny. По-моему, это ужасно смешно....
32. Перевод слова straightStraight — прямой, прямо Перевод слова The straightest way to — самый прямой путь в straight run — беспосадочный полет to ride straight — ехать напрямик to drink straight from the bottle — пить прямо из горлышка Are you going Straight to London? Вы едете прямо в Лондон? He shot Straight. Он метко выстрелил. He ... Читать далее...
33. Перевод слова restaurantRestaurant — ресторан Перевод слова Buffet restaurant — ресторанчик, работающий по системе «шведский стол» decent restaurant — приличный ресторан to dine at a restaurant — обедать в ресторане We had dinner at a local Restaurant. Мы поужинали в местном ресторане. That Restaurant was a real find! Тот ресторан был настоящей находкой! The Restaurant opened earlier ... Читать далее...
34. Значение идиомы take-out order[take-out order] {n. phr.} An order in a restaurant that one doesnot eat on the premises, but takes home. The new Chinese restauranton the corner sells nice take-out orders....
35. Staying InIt’s Friday night and my Roommate and I feel like Staying in. We’ve both had a Tough week at work and decided to have a Low-key evening. On my way home, I stopped at the Video rental store And rented a couple of movies. I got a New release and a Classic. I thought I ... Читать далее...
36. Ordering Food DeliveryOrder clerk: Hello, Torino’s Restaurant. Nancy: Hello, I’d like To place a Delivery order. Order clerk: Can I have your address and the Major cross streets, please? Nancy: It’s 1212 Main Street, and the nearest cross streets are Speedway and Highland. Order clerk: Okay, it looks like you’re in our Delivery area. What would you ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы drop off[drop off] {v.} 1. To take part of the way you are going. Joe asked Mrs. Jones to drop him off at the library on her way downtown. 2. To go to sleep. Jimmy was thinking of his birthday party as he dropped off to sleep. 3. To die. The patient dropped off in his ... Читать далее...
38. A Restaurant Drive-ThruI had a little time between appointments and stopped at a fast food restaurant to get some lunch. The idea was To save time by using the drive-thru, but it didn’t work out that way. Order-taker: Welcome to McDenny’s. May I take your order? Daniel: Yes. I’d like a Cheeseburger, an order of French fries, ... Читать далее...
39. One summer evening during a violent thunderstormOne summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, «Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?» The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. «I can’t dear,» she said. «I ... Читать далее...
40. Ordering fast foodThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. One night, a few co-workers at the computer data centre where I work stayed late and we all started to get hungry. We decided to order in food by phone, but our ... Читать далее...