Collection 14

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1. Collection 13We know that you would give your life for us. Promise! When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, I’ll say it was your stupidity. Well, I’ll see you in my dreams — if I eat too much. Hey, I remember you when you had only one stomach. ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова stareStare — вглядываться, пристальный взгляд Перевод слова A bewitching stare — обворожительный взгляд a cold stare — холодный взгляд to stare out of the window — глазеть в окно to stare into the distance — смотреть вдаль What are you Staring at? На что ты уставился? She gave him a cold Stare. Она наградила его ... Читать далее...
3. A man says to his wifeA man says to his wife, «Get ready you, me & the dog are going fishing.» Wife says, «I dont want to go.» Man gives her 3 choices, fishing, blow job or take it up the a*se. Wife pick blow job. After she sucking for a while she says, «It tastes like sh*t. Man says, ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова moonlightMoonlight — лунный свет Перевод слова To walk by moonlight — гулять при свете луны pale moonlight — тусклый цвет луны moonlight flit — тайный съезд с квартиры ночью, чтобы не платить за нее We dined by Moonlight. Мы ужинали при свете Луны. He robed himself in Moonlight. Он окунулся в сияние лунного света. The ... Читать далее...
5. Перевод слова uglyUgly — уродливый, безобразный, противный Перевод слова Ugly clothes — некрасивая одежда ugly building — уродливое здание ugly habits — скверные привычки He has an Ugly disposition. У него отвратительный характер. Jealousy is an Ugly emotion. Ревность — это неприятное чувство. The prince was transformed into an Ugly animal. Принц был превращен в ужасного дикого ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова photoPhoto — фото Перевод слова A close-up photo — фотография крупным планом photo exhibit — фотовыставка photo session — фотосессия Her Photo was prominently displayed on his desk. Ее фотография была хорошо заметна на его письменном столе. You can see the hard core of the group on the Photo. На фотографии вы видите наиболее активных ... Читать далее...
7. Collection 15If you were a swine, you would be what you are now! You say that you are always bright and early. Well, OK!! We know you are early. A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it. You’re nobody’s fool. Let’s see if we can get someone to adopt ... Читать далее...
8. Collection 12What’s the latest dope — besides you? I heard that they tried to take an X-ray picture of your jaw, but all they got was a moving picture. You don’t believe in being artificial. You want people to hate you for yourself. When people cut their fingers you cry over it just so that you ... Читать далее...
9. A technical bastardA couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about to leave, and asked him to marry them. He asked if they had a license and, when they didn’t, sent them off to get one. They caught the town clerk just as he was locking up, ... Читать далее...
10. Need fishing licensesA couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bush’s jumped the Game Warden!! Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden. After about a half mile the fella ... Читать далее...
11. Please show the I. DThe following supposedly a true story. This guy walked into a little corner store with a shot gun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the ... Читать далее...
12. Перевод слова totalTotal — общий, итог, сумма; абсолютный, полный Перевод слова The total number of persons — общее число людей the grand total — общий итог total absurdity — абсолютная нелепость total disappearance — полное исчезновение The car was a Total wreck. Автомобиль был полностью разбит. The jobless Total is around 4 million. Общее количество безработных — ... Читать далее...
13. Значение идиомы ugly duckling[ugly duckling] {n.} An ugly or plain child who grows up to bepretty and attractive. Mary was the ugly duckling in her family, until she grew up....
14. TraditionsA man and a woman got married, and he told her : » since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for ... Читать далее...
15. Значение идиомы the creeps[the creeps] {n.}, {informal} 1. An uncomfortable tightening of theskin caused by fear or shock. Reading the story of a ghost gave Joethe creeps. The queer noises in the old house gave Mary thecreeps. 2. A strong feeling of fear or disgust. The cold, damp, lonely swamp gave John the creeps. The dog was so ... Читать далее...
16. Значение идиомы sum total[sum total] {n.} The final amount; everything taken together;total. The sum total of expenses for the trip was $450. Tenyears was the sum total of John’s education....
17. A man running a little behind schedule arrivesA man running a little behind schedule arrives at a picture theatre, goes in to watch the movie that has already started, and as his eyes adjust to the darkness, he is surprised to see a dog sitting beside its master in the row ahead, intently watching the movie. It even seemed to be enjoying ... Читать далее...
18. Collection 02Even your best friend cheats on you and lies to you, and that’s the best friend you can get. I don’t think you are a fool. But then, what’s my own humble opinion against thousands of others? Nobody says that you are dumb. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how ... Читать далее...
19. Collection 10Why don’t you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance? I hear you changed your mind! What did you do with the diaper? You have an inferiority complex — and it’s fully justified. You are not as bad as people say — you are worse! Do you have to leave so soon? ... Читать далее...
20. Collection 08For two cents, I’d give you a piece of my mind — and all of yours. You are the only person I’ve ever met whose mind is filthy and sterile at the same time! You have no trouble making ends meet. Your foot is always in your mouth! I heard you went to see the ... Читать далее...
21. Collection 03Would you like to replace my business partner who died this morning? I’ll arrange it with the undertaker. People say that you are outspoken, but not by anyone that I know of. Your conversation is like the waves of the sea. It makes me sick! We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips ... Читать далее...
22. Collection 01If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. If you don’t want to give people a bad name, you will have your children illegitimately. Is your name Laryngitis? You’re a pain in the neck. Is your name Dan Druff? You get into people’s hair. ... Читать далее...
23. Collection 07I hear you are a real humanitarian. You have kept three or four detectives working regularly. I hear you are connected to the Police Department — by a pair of handcuffs. Hello — tall, dark and obnoxious! You remind me of the ocean — you make me sick. You should have been born in the ... Читать далее...
24. Collection 09ClassYou must have gotten up on the wrong side of the cage this morning. I would ask you how old you are, but I know you can’t count that high. In the next life, you’ll blaze a way for us. You are master in your own house — the doghouse! When you die, I’d like ... Читать далее...
25. Collection 05Yours was an unnatural birth; you came from a human being. You have nothing to fear from my base instincts; its my finer ones that tell me to kill you. It’s your life — but I wish you’d let us have it. Hey, act your age — senile! I’ve had many cases of love that ... Читать далее...
26. Collection 11You used to be arrogant and obnoxious. Now you are just the opposite. You are obnoxious and arrogant. You are down to earth, but not quite far down enough. If you were twice as smart, you’d still be stupid. I know you are nobody’s fool, but maybe someone will adopt you. You were the answer ... Читать далее...
27. Collection 04I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you! I think you should live for the moment. But after that, I doubt I’ll think so. Man alive! But I wish you weren’t. I believe in respect for the dead; in fact, I could only respect you if you WERE dead. Is your ... Читать далее...
28. Collection 06We hear you are a lady killer. They take one look at you and die of fright!! We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, «Do not come home and all will be forgiven». You have a good family tree, but the crop is a failure. I ... Читать далее...
29. Collection 16At least you are not obnoxious like so many other people — you are obnoxious in a different and worse way! You have a lot of well-wishers. They would all like to throw you down one. You remind me of Moses. Every time you open your mouth, the bull rushes. They say that travel broadens ... Читать далее...
30. Car company namesAUDI Accelerates Under Demonic Influence Always Unsafe Designs Implemented All Un-informed Drivers Insulted All Unnecessary Devices Installed BMW Big Money Works Bought My Wife Brutal Money Waster BUICK Big Ugly Indestructable Car Killer CHEVROLET Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time DODGE Dumb Old ... Читать далее...
31. You tell me!A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to «enforce the laws pending.» He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, «Looks like you’ve had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?» The hunter shrugged and handed the ducks to the warden. The warden ... Читать далее...
32. Моя коллекция/ My CollectionНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык My Collection Моя коллекция Hobbies in most people’s lives occupy important place. In this case I’m not an exception. My hobby from the very early age is collecting stamps and coins from different countries. Most of the samples were given to me by my father who in his ... Читать далее...
33. Dedicated geologistsTotal immersion geologists Total immersion geologists: Are you totally obsessed with geology? If so, then you are a total immersion geologist. Here are the ten warning signs: 1. You judge a restaurant by the type of decorative building stone they use rather than their food. 2. You manage to turn any conversation into a discussion ... Читать далее...
34. A man moves into a nudist colonyA man moves into a nudist colony. He receives a letter from his mother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half and sends her the top part. Later he ... Читать далее...
35. Значение идиомы give one the eye[give one the eye] {v. phr.}, {slang} 1. To look at, especiallywith interest and liking. A pretty girl went by and all the boysgave her the eye. 2. To look or stare at, especially in a cold orunfriendly way. Mrs. Jones didn’t like Mary and didn’t speak. Shejust gave her the eye when they met ... Читать далее...
36. Перевод слова licenseLicense — разрешать, давать разрешение Перевод слова To license a doctor to practise medicine — выдать врачу разрешение заниматься врачебной практикой to license the letting of lodgings — разрешить сдачу квартир внаем to license a book — разрешить издание книги Is the firm Licensed to sell securities in Connecticut? У фирмы есть разрешение на продажу ... Читать далее...
37. A construction worker was whistlingA construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled «Well you’re an ugly bitch anyway!» The girl turned around and replied «It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won’t give you ... Читать далее...
38. Passing a parrotA lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, «Hey lady, you are really ugly.» Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same ... Читать далее...
39. The last day working«You Know It’s Your Last Day At Work When……» You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, «What’s this?», you realize you just dropped the company’s deposit in a mailbox. A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, «I waited on the last fat ugly old ... Читать далее...
40. Значение идиомы hope against hope[hope against hope] {v. phr.} To try to hope when things lookblack; hold to hope in bad trouble. The mother continued to hopeagainst hope although the plane was hours late. Jane hoped againsthope that Joe would call her....