China blames America
Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters. China demanded an apology from us and stole technology from our plane when it was forced to make an emergency landing in Chinese lands.
China blames U. S. for second mid-air collision!
Beijing (Reuters) – Chinese officials have stated they are holding the United States,” Fully responsible” for today’s mid air collision, involving several Chinese aircraft and one American aircraft. This comes just weeks after a similar incident involving a U. S. spy plane.
Officials have stated that at approximately 8:46am, GMT, a squadron of F-8 fighters collided with the American Goodyear Blimp. The crash left over a dozen Chinese fighters downed and the blimps electronic billboard damaged.
A Chinese pilot who witnessed the collision involving his squadron, nicknamed “Panda Rash”, told China’s news agency that
“I told Thee Dork his tail was all broken. Keep it straight. Keep it straight.” said the pilot “He could not shake the American foreign-devil” The blimp reportedly then veered left then right, taking out the rest of the squadron.
Pilot Chawp Sueey told Xinhua the American blimp ” Fully responsible for the incident” repeating the language Beijing had used in the earlier incident.
China blames this new accident on the Goodyear blimp, saying it rammed the supersonic fighters, and has demanded an apology.
Officials from the Goodyear Company have said it is unlikely that the slow propeller driven blimp could turn inside and ram a dozen nimble fighters unless the Chinese were testing chimp pilots.
“The direct cause of the collision was that the American blimp made a sudden big move toward the Chinese planes, making it impossible for the Chinese planes to get out of the way. The savage act of American blimps colliding with Chinese planes while conducting spying missions at sporting events makes us indignant” Chawp Sueey was quoted as saying.
Chinese officials are calling for an apology from the United States and enough Goodyear tires to replace the Firestone’s that experienced spontaneous combustion last year.
Related topics:
- Apologizing to China Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters. China demanded an apology from us and stole technology from our plane when it was forced to make an emergency landing in Chinese lands. Dear China, We’re sorry you don’t train your fighter pilots […]...
- Chinese plane crash Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters. China demanded an apology from us and stole technology from our plane when it was forced to make an emergency landing in Chinese lands. In a heroic dogfight, fought over international waters off the […]...
- Chinese learned this Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters. China demanded an apology from us and stole technology from our plane when it was forced to make an emergency landing in Chiese lands. Top Ten Things The Chinese Have Learned By Examining Our […]...
- Перевод слова china China – фарфор Перевод слова Eggshell china – тонкий фарфор china clay – фарфоровая глина, каолин china closet – буфет A punch bowl of Bow China. Кубок для пунша из боуского фарфора. These fine China cups damage easily. Эти тонкие фарфоровые чашки легко повредить. Broken China crunched under my feet. Осколки фарфора хрустели у меня […]...
- China Топик Китай рассказывает о крупнейшем по численности населения государстве мира и третьем в мире по территории, после России и Канады. Благодаря письменным источникам и археологическим данным, можно проследить историю Китая с глубокой древности. Страна была монархией, социалистической республикой, а сейчас открыта всему остальному миру. Многие зарубежные студенты обучаются в Китае, где для них созданы благоприятные […]...
- An American tourist is visiting China An American tourist is visiting China. After visiting all the tourist attractions he decides to inquire about the people and askes his guide: “How large is the population here?” “Around 1.5 billion” – the guide answers American, After a short pause: “So, what else do you do here?”...
- The Great Wall of China The Great Wall of China is the biggest object ever made by humans. It stretches across mountains, deserts and grasslands for over 6,000 kilometres. The ancient Chinese built the wall to keep invaders from the west out of their country. Today tourists from all over the world come and see it. The Great Wall began […]...
- ‘Kung Fu Panda’ Hits A Sore Spot in China Why a Quintessentially Chinese Movie Was Made in Hollywood BEIJING – The blockbuster success of an American animated movie that’s set in ancient China, highlights Chinese culture, mythology and architecture and stars a kung fu fighting panda has filmmakers and ordinary Chinese wondering: Why wasn’t this hit made. . . in China? “Kung Fu Panda” […]...
- China – Китай China is a unique country known in the whole world. It has many characteristics, which single it out from the other countries. First this is the most populated country and because of this reason there is a big number of the Chinese, who move to other countries and settle there. China also belongs to a […]...
- Million-dollar bill user pleads ignorance, blames Treasury A woman who tried to use a fake $1 million bill to buy $1,675 worth of merchandise at Wal-Mart said it was all just a misunderstanding – she thought the bill was real. The United States Treasury does not make $1 million bills. “You can’t keep up with the U. S. Treasury,” said Alice Pike, […]...
- Ex-NBA Star Yao Ming Aims to Wean China Off Ivory and Shark Fins BEIJING – Former NBA all-star center Yao Ming is now dishing out assists to much wilder targets. After retiring from the Houston Rockets in 2011, Yao returned to China and set out to end his homeland’s traditional appetite for endangered and threatened animal products. As an ambassador for international conservation organization WildAid, Yao has campaigned […]...
- Landing at a hidden military base You’ve all heard of the Air Force’s ultra-high-security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as “Area 51?” Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very surprised to see a Cessna landing at their “secret” base. They immediately impounded the aircraft and hauled the pilot into an interrogation room. The […]...
- Canada America An American will say, “Hot day!” A Canadian will say, “Hot day, eh?” meaning “It’s a hot day, isn’t it?” This is something deeper than spelling or pronunciation. It goes to the heart of the less-assertive Canadian character. The United States was born when Americans revolted against King George III and asserted their independence. Canada […]...
- Китай/ China На английском языке Перевод на русский язык China Китай China is an extraordinary country. Firstly, it’s one of the largest states in the world. Secondly, it is the home of the very first recoded civilization. Thirdly, its history is complex and rich, connected with ancient forms of ruling dynasties. It’s not a secret that it […]...
- Значение идиомы China syndrome [China syndrome] {n.}, {informal} From the title of the movie with Jane Fonda and Jack Lemmon. The possibility that an industrial nuclear reactor might explode, literally affecting the other side of the planet. Antinuclear demonstrators are greatly worried about the China syndrome....
- Stuck in a plane George Bushes, father Bush and son Bush, Bush, Jr., are on board a small two seater plane when suddenly George Senior, the pilot, parachutes out of the plane. Not knowing how to fly, National Guard Service or not, a plane George, Jr., grabs the radio. “Mayday, mayday! My Dad just jumped out of the plane!” […]...
- A photographer from a well known national magazine A photographer from a well known national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and […]...
- Finding a Chinese Jew Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. “Sid,” asked Al, “are there any Jews in China?” “I don’t know,” Sid replied. “Why don’t we ask the waiter?” When the waiter came by, Al asked him, “Are there any Chinese Jews?” “I don’t know sir, let me ask,” the waiter replied, and he went […]...
- Значение идиомы crash-dive [crash-dive] {v.} 1. To dive deep under water in a submarine as quickly as possible. We shall crash-dive if we see enemy planes coming. 2. To dive into in an airplane. When the plane’s motor was hit by the guns of the enemy battleship, the pilot aimed the plane at the ship and crash-dived into […]...
- China bans ‘erotic’ banana-eating live streams Chinese live-streaming services have banned people filming themselves eating bananas in a “seductive” fashion. New regulations mean that live-streaming sites must monitor all their output round-the-clock to ensure nothing untoward is going on, keeping an eye out for any “erotic” banana-eating, according to New Express Daily. It’s not just fruit that’s on their radar though […]...
- The United States of America – Соединенные Штаты Америки (3) The USA is a federal republic of 50 states. Besides the 48 contiguous states that occupy the middle latitudes of the continent, the United States includes the state of Alaska at the north-western extreme of North America and the island state of Hawaii in the mid-Pacific Ocean. The conterminous states are bounded on the north […]...
- Древний Китай/ Ancient China На английском языке Перевод на русский язык Ancient China Древний Китай The history of ancient China has always fascinated people. Along with ancient Egypt, Babylon and India, this country presents one of the four ancient civilizations with thousands of years of continuous history. Its cradle is believed to be the Yellow River. The first written […]...
- Значение идиомы bull in a china shop [bull in a china shop] {n. phr.} A rough or clumsy person who says or does something to anger others or upset plans; a tactless person. We were talking politely and carefully with the teacher about a class party, but John came in like a bull in a china shop and his rough talk made […]...
- The United States of America – Соединенные Штаты Америки (2) After 350 years of development the United States of America still holds the leading position in the western world. The USA is the most powerful and highly developed country of the world. The United States of America lies in the central part of North American continent. Its western coast is washed by the Pacific Ocean. […]...
- Irish and America The American connection is based on such enormous numbers of Irish men and women making their way to the New World for so many different reasons that nobody is quite sure of the actual numbers involved. It is estimated that in the period between 1717 and 1775 something like a quarter of a million Ulstermen […]...
- Give us new missiles The 1982 Israeli invasion of Lebanon resulted in many dogfights between Syrian and Israeli jet fighters. In the end, the Syrians lost over 80 planes and had a number of SAM batteries knocked out, while the Israelis lost no planes. Sometime later, the Syrian Defense Minister was shopping for weapons in Moscow. His host, the […]...
- Перевод слова apology Apology – извинение, оправдание Перевод слова Humble apology – смиренное раскаяние to demand an apology – потребовать извинений public apology – публичные извинения sincere apology – искренние извинения I feel I owe you an Apology. Я чувствую, что я должен извиниться перед вами. She finally received an Apology from the company. В конце концов она […]...
- A tourist from the United States of America A tourist from the United States of America is at a resturant in Havana. He tells the waiter that the USA is the best country in the world because of the freedoms it has. He says, “Take Freedom of Speech for example. I could stand in front of the White House in Washington D. C. […]...
- Blind man and guide dog kicked off plane; passengers follow in support Usually airline passengers side with flight attendants when it comes to safety, but in the case of a US Airways flight Wednesday night, passengers rallied around a blind man and his guide dog and disembarked en masse. All 35 passengers on US Airways Flight 4384 walked off the plane after Albert Rizzi, a blind man […]...
- A few questions and answers Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant. Q. What’s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money. Q. What’s the difference between your wife and your job? A. After five years your job will still suck. Q. How can you spot […]...
- Перевод слова incident Incident – инцидент, происшествие Перевод слова Amusing / funny / humorous incident – забавный случай curious incident – любопытный случай painful / unpleasant incident – неприятный случай pleasant incident – приятное событие strange incident – странный случай touching incident – трогательное происшествие ugly incident – отвратительное происшествие The Incident caused great alarm. Происшествие вызвало большой […]...
- President precedent Difference Between a Bad *President* and a Bad *Precedent* … BAD *PRECEDENT: Tipper: “How does it feel to be the big man, Hon?” Al: “Well Tip, it took 17 lawsuits and 18 months of election recounts, but I’d do it all again.” … BAD *PRESIDENT: Mr. Bush, repeat after me. I do solemnly swear – […]...
- At The Superbowl Bob received a free ticket to the Superbowl from his company. Unfortunately, when Bob arrived at the stadium he realizes the seat is in the last row in the corner of the stadium – he is closer to the Goodyear Blimp than the field. About halfway through the first quarter, Bob noticed an empty seat […]...
- A closer call The Pilots One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting for the cockpit crew to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and co pilot finally appear in the rear of the plane, and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both […]...
- The United States of America Топик Соединенные Штаты Америки рассказывает об истории и символах Америки, которую называют просто “Штаты”, “США” и т. д. Это огромная страна, ранее заселенная индейцами, а сейчас в ней проживают выходцы из многих стран мира, и американский народ еще называют “нацией наций”. В 1620 году группа пуритан, преследуемых в Англии, приплыли к берегам Америки на корабле […]...
- A Negro was travelling in china A negro was travelling in china. In a remote village, he came upon an elderly chinaman skipping stones across a lake. At each bounce of the stone off the water, the mountains surrounding the lake echoed back, “CHING…CHANG…CHUN…” The negro was amazed. He asked the chinaman what was going on. “Oh”, said the chinee, “magic […]...
- Humor about Irish Pubs (Setting the scene, Ballymun outside of Dublin has a reputation as a rough spot) Fifteen minutes into Aer Lingus Flight EI109 from Madrid to Dublin the Plane encounters a serious problem with the Instrument landing systems. In a Fit of Panic, Paddy the Pilot turns to his co-Pilot and says. “Jazus Mick…Well have to turn […]...
- Change your course now This is the transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations on November 10, 1995. Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision. Canadians: Recommend you […]...
- The United States of America – Соединенные Штаты Америки (4) The United States is the worlds greatest economic power, measured in terms of gross national product (GNP). The nations wealth is partly a reflection of its rich natural resources and its enormous agricultural output, but it owes more to the country’s highly developed industry. Despite its relative economic self-sufficiency in many areas, the United States […]...
- Issuing a Public Apology Working in Public relations, I often have to deal with my clients’ Gaffes and Blunders. My job is to calm any Firestorm before it Gets out of hand. One of the most important things to do whenever there’s been a Misstep is to issue a Public apology. An apology should say Plainly and clearly that […]...