Brain or muscles?

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1. A construction worker was whistlingA construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled «Well you’re an ugly bitch anyway!» The girl turned around and replied «It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won’t give you ... Читать далее...
2. A construction worker goes to the doctor and saysA construction worker goes to the doctor and says, «Doc, I’m constipated.» The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, «Lean over the table.» The construction worker leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a baseball bat, and then sends him into the bathroom. He comes out a ... Читать далее...
3. Visiting a Construction SiteBill: Ma’am! ma’am! Estelle: Yes? Bill: Ma’am, you’re not supposed to be here. This is a Construction site and you’re not allowed. Please don’t step on that Scaffolding. It’s dangerous. Estelle: Oh, I just wanted a quick look to see how the building is Coming along. Look at all this Lumber and Brick. The Foundation ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова constructionConstruction — сооружение, строительство Перевод слова Modular construction — модульная конструкция machinery construction — машиностроение dam construction project — проект по строительству плотины The new skyscraper is under Construction. Строится новый небоскреб. We both heard what he said, but she put quite a different Construction on it. Мы все слышали его слова, но она истолковала ... Читать далее...
5. Last LunchThree steel workers were having lunch at the construction site, a 20 story building. The first worker is Italian and when he looks in his lunch box, he exclaims, «Oh, no, if I have to eat spaghetti for lunch one more time, I going to jump off the 20th floor and kill myself.» The second ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова strengthStrength — сила, прочность Перевод слова The strength of a rope — прочность веревки strength of materials — сопротивление материалов a position of strength — позиция силы In unity there is Strength. В единстве сила. Jo hit him with all her Strength. Джо ударила его изо всех сил. My Strength is draining away. Мои силы ... Читать далее...
7. Construction Worker Hides Waldo On Site For Kids In Hospital Next DoorOne man is helping kids find a little joy. Jason Haney, a construction foreman, hides a life-size cutout he made of Where’s Waldo on site every day for kids who are staying at a hospital next door to find. «It’s just for the kids to get their minds off of things,»Haney told The Huffington Post. ... Читать далее...
8. Значение идиомы tower of strength[tower of strength] {n. phr.} Someone who is strong, helpful, andsympathetic, and can always be relied on in times of trouble. Johnwas a veritable tower of strength to our family while my father was inthe war and my mother lay ill in the hospital....
9. Перевод слова workerWorker — работник, трудящийся, сотрудник Перевод слова Factory and office workers — рабочие и служащие brain worker — работник умственного труда fellow worker — сотрудник, сослуживец She is a very responsible Worker. Она — очень ответственный работник. The Worker bee is neuter. Рабочая пчела бесплодна. The Worker was dismissed for laziness. Рабочего уволили за лень. ... Читать далее...
10. Clean Jokes about IrelandAn American and an Irishman were enjoying a ride in the country when they came upon an unusual sight — an old gallows. The American thought he would have a joke on his Irish companion. «You see that, I reckon,» said he to the Irishman, pointing to the gallows. «And now where would you be ... Читать далее...
11. An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger ladyAn older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady and they are very much in love. However, no matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi. The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the ... Читать далее...
12. A construction worker came home just in time to find his wifeA construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his Wet Willy in a vise. He secured it tightly and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, «Stop! ... Читать далее...
13. A young priest, who is still unsure of the penance to dole outA young priest, who is still unsure of the penance to dole out during confession, asks an older priest what he should give a cocksucker. «Oh,» says the older priest, «give the altar boy a dollar or so, if you feel like it. Personally, I never give them more than fifty cents.»...
14. Значение идиомы go from strength to strength[go from strength to strength] {v. phr.} To move forward, increasing one’s fame, power, or fortune in a series of successfulachievements. Our basketball team has gone from strength tostrength....
15. Magic Mushrooms Create a Hyperconnected BrainMagic mushrooms can create vivid hallucinations of strange and fantastical things, such as abstract geometric shapes. Magic mushrooms may give users trippy experiences by creating a hyperconnected brain. The active ingredient in the psychedelic drug, psilocybin, seems to completely disrupt the normal communication networks in the brain, by connecting «brain regions that don’t normally talk ... Читать далее...
16. Two Italian construction workersTwo Italian construction workers were in the field on an extremely hot day working.. the one says to the other «hey how come we do all a da work and he gets all a da money?» pointing to the supervisor. The other says, «I don’t know, go ask him.» So Guido goes up to the ... Читать далее...
17. Значение идиомы on the strength of[on the strength of] {prep.} With faith or trust in; dependingupon; with the support of. On the strength of Jim’s promise toguide us, we decided to climb the mountain. Bill started arestaurant on the strength of his experience as a cook in the army....
18. Unkind CommentsYesterday, I was talking to an Ex-colleague of mine who, Quite frankly, has something of a Big mouth. I Bumped into him at the beach, where he was Walking his dog. Anyway, as I was saying, he’s the kind of guy that’s always Bad mouthing his Co-workers. So he Comes up to Me and says, ... Читать далее...
19. The cost of a brainA man went to a brain store to get some brain to complete a study. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brain offerred at this particular brain store. He begins to question the butcher about the cost of these brains. «How much does it cost for engineer brain?» «Three dollars an ... Читать далее...
20. After their love-making session the young bride asks her husbandAfter their love-making session the young bride asks her husband «Was making love to me really the same as making love to Marilyn Monroe?» «Yes, she’s dead to!»»Was making love to me really the same as making love to Marilyn Monroe?» «Yes, she’s dead to!»...
21. A young wife, her boorish husband and a young good lookingA young wife, her boorish husband and a young good looking sailor were shipwrecked on an island. One morning, the sailor climbed a tall coconut tree and yelled, «Stop making love down there!» «What’s the matter with you?» the husband said when the sailor climbed down. «We weren’t making love.» «Sorry,» said the sailor, «From ... Читать далее...
22. The homework scheduleHere is an explanation of the school homework policy for the average student. Students should not spend more than ninety minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the following manner if the student desires to achieve moderate to good grades in his/her classes. 15 minutes looking for assignment. 11 minutes calling a friend ... Читать далее...
23. Eight weeks to a better brainMeditation study shows changes associated with awareness, stress. Participating in an eight-week mindfulness meditation program appears to make measurable changes in brain regions associated with memory, sense of self, empathy, and stress. In a study that will appear in the Jan. 30 issue of Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, a team led by Harvard-affiliated researchers at Massachusetts ... Читать далее...
24. Значение идиомы look up to[look up to] {v.} To think of as a good example to copy;honor; respect. Mr. Smith had taught for many years, and all thestudents looked up to him. Young children look up to older ones, so older children should be good examples....
25. Dealing with troubleA deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The «disturbance» turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds. What’s more, he boasted that he could whip the deputy and Muhammad Ali too. Said the policeman, «I’ll bet that you’re also an escape artist-probably better than ... Читать далее...
26. There were these three morticians talking aboutThere were these three morticians talking about their greatest feats. The first one says, «I had this soldier who stepped on a land mine. Took me three days to get him ready for an open casket funeral!!» The next guy says, «oh yeah? I had this construction worker fall 15 stories, then he got run ... Читать далее...
27. Kiss meyeah!«Kiss me,» said the young lady urgently. «Please kiss me.» But the young man turned his head away, saying, «Of course not. How can I? I’m your own brother-in-law. Hell, we shouldn’t even be lying here making love.»...
28. An older woman was in the pastoral studyAn older woman was in the pastoral study counceling for her upcoming fourth wedding. «Father,» she said, «How am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?» «My child, you have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be,» he replied. «Well Father, my first husband was a ... Читать далее...
29. It was the age when knighthood was in flowerIt was the age when knighthood was in flower. A young lady was pounding away at a piece of iron with a sledgehammer. Another young lady saw her and asked, «What are you doing?» The first one answered, «I’m making socks and sweater for some soldier boy!»...
30. Marriage quotes 04A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. — Guitry Ah Mozart! He was happily married — but his wife wasn’t. — Borge Always talk to your wife while you’re making love… if there’s a phone handy. An archaeologist ... Читать далее...
31. THE HUMAN BRAIN IN SPACE: EUPHORIA AND THE «OVERVIEW EFFECT» EXPERIENCED BY ASTRONAUTSCould be the best example yet of being «spaced out»? When in space, astronauts have repeatedly reported inexplicable euphoria, a «cosmic connection» or an increased sensitivity to their place in the Universe. The experience sounds like the ultimate high, or the ultimate enlightening; it would appear that without trying, astronauts are able to attain a ... Читать далее...
32. GuiltyScene: A court room in Oklahoma where a person is on trial for murder. There is strong evidence indicating guilt; however, there is no corpse. In the defense’s closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client is guilty and that it looks like he’ll probably be convicted, resorts to a clever trick. «Ladies and gentlemen ... Читать далее...
33. Heated passionsMike and Keith are playing golf one hot Sunday afternoon. While approaching the sixteenth hole, they notice an old golfer teeing up by himself. The two friends stop and wait for the older golfer to finish his hole. After the old man drives the ball a considerable distance down the fairway, he collapses on the ... Читать далее...
34. For his wife’s birthday party, a doctor ordered a cakeFor his wife’s birthday party, a doctor ordered a cake with this inscription: «You are not getting older, You are just getting better.» When asked how he wanted it arranged, he said, «Just put ‘You are not getting older’ at the top, and ‘You are just getting better’ at the bottom.» It wasn’t until the ... Читать далее...
35. Значение идиомы under construction[under construction] {adv. phr.} In the process of being built orrepaired. It is a good idea to take the train to work while theexpressway is under construction....
36. Перевод слова siteSite — место, местоположение, местонахождение Перевод слова The site of the coal industry — центр угольной промышленности the site of a battle — поле боя, место сражения the site of the fire — место пожара We have now finished coaling at the Site. Сейчас мы закончили добычу угля в этом месторождении. Be sure to visit ... Читать далее...
37. Перевод слова strongStrong — сильный, крепкий, твердый Перевод слова Strong will — сильная воля strong constitution — крепкое здоровье strong denial — решительный отказ He’s as Strong as an ox. Он силен, как бык. He was a big Strong man. Он был большим и сильным человеком. Tact isn’t my Strong point. Тактичность не является моей отличительной чертой. ... Читать далее...
38. Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6, are listening through the keyhole as their older sister is getting it on with her new boyfriend. They hear her say, «Oh, Jim, you’re going where no man has gone before!» The six-year-old says to his brother, «He must be fucking her up the ass!»...
39. Перевод слова competentCompetent — осведомленный, сведущий Перевод слова Competent teacher — квалифицированный учитель competent authority — авторитетный специалист competent jurisdiction — надлежащая юрисдикция The court is not Competent to deal with this case. Суд не вправе рассматривать это дело. The workmen did a Competent job. Рабочие сделали грамотную работу. She’s a highly Competent linguist. Она очень компетентный ... Читать далее...
40. A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuitA big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace ... Читать далее...