Brain or muscles?

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1. Значение идиомы long haul [long haul] or [long pull] {n.}, {informal} 1. A long distance ortrip. It is a long haul to drive across the country. ContrastSHORT HAUL. 2. A long length of time during which work continues orsomething is done; a long time of trying. A boy crippled by poliomay learn to walk again, but it may be […]...
2. Перевод слова wages Wages – плата за работу, зарплата, расплата Перевод слова To dock the wages – производить вычеты из заработной платы king-size wages – огромный оклад low wages – низкая заработная плата upstanding wages – твердая зарплата back wages – зарплата, выплаченная с опозданием Law can never regulate Wages properly. Закон никогда не может в должной мере […]...
3. Three couples wanted to join a church Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor says, “We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.” The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor goes to the […]...
4. Several weeks after a young man had been hired Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director’s office. “What is the meaning of this?” the director asked. “When you applied for this job, you told us you had five years experience. Now we discovered this is the first job you’ve ever held.” “Well,” the young man […]...
5. Значение идиомы short haul [short haul] {n.} A short distance; a short trip. TheScoutmaster said that it was just a short haul to the lake. Theman from the moving company said they did not make short hauls, so wehired a truck to move our furniture three blocks to our new house. Contrast: LONG HAUL....
6. Being hurt A husband and wife went to the fairgrounds. The wife wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, but the husband wasn’t comfortable with that. So the wife went on the ride by herself. The wheel went round and round and suddenly the wife was thrown out and landed in a heap at her husband’s feet. […]...
7. Need fishing licenses A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bush’s jumped the Game Warden!! Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden. After about a half mile the fella […]...
8. Перевод сленгового выражения love handles, значение и пример использования Сленговое выражение: love handles Перевод: неприглядные жировые отложения на боках талии (употребляется обычно по отношению к мужчинам) Пример: I need to exercise more – my love handles are growing! Мне нужно больше заниматься – у меня увеличиваются бока!...
9. During World War II, Hitler told his Nazis to rape During World War II, Hitler told his Nazis to rape as may French women as they could then say, “In nine months you will have a baby. Name it Adolf. Heil Hitler!” So a young Nazi soldier, eager to do his duty, dutifully went out and raped a pretty young French girl. He said, “In […]...
10. Значение идиомы haul in [haul in] or [haul up] or [pull in] {v.}, {slang} To bring beforesomeone in charge for punishment or questioning; arrest. John washauled in to court for speeding. The tramp was hauled up forsleeping on the sidewalk. Compare: CALL ON THE CARPET....
11. Перевод слова wheel Wheel – колесо; катить, везти Перевод слова Watchwork wheels – колесики часового механизма to wheel the cart into the yard – вкатить тележку во двор the patient was wheeled in – ввезли больного The Wheel turns round. Колесо вращается. Don’t reinvent Wheel. Не нужно заново изобретать колесо. Birds Wheeled above us in the sky. В […]...
12. A policeman was patrolling near midnight A policeman was patrolling near midnight at a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. Inside there was a young man in the driver’s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat calmly knitting. He […]...
13. A young priest, who is still unsure of the penance to dole out A young priest, who is still unsure of the penance to dole out during confession, asks an older priest what he should give a cocksucker. “Oh,” says the older priest, “give the altar boy a dollar or so, if you feel like it. Personally, I never give them more than fifty cents.”...
14. Excuse TO smoke Two teens had been lovers for a few weeks, but the boy was always after the girl to quit smoking. One afternoon, she lit up after some love making, and he said, “You really ought to quit.” She, getting tired of his nagging, said, “I really enjoy a good cigarette after sex.” He replied, “But […]...
15. A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. A friend of his said, “I thought she wanted one of those sporty 4-Wheel drive vehicles.” “She did,” he replied. “But where in the hell was I gonna find a fake Jeep?”...
16. Trapped within a bog Paddy was trapped in a bog and seemed a goner when Big Mick O’Reilly wandered by. “Help!” Paddy shouted, “Oi’m sinkin’!” Don’t worry,” assured Mick. “Next to the Strong Muldoon, Oi’m the strongest man in Erin, and Oi’ll pull ye right out o’ there.” Mick leaned out and grabbed Paddy’s hand and pulled and pulled […]...
17. Значение идиомы plague on both your houses [plague on both your houses] or [plague o’ both your houses] Badluck to both of you! – Used to show disgust at those who wont stopquarreling. The bus drivers went on strike because the bus companywould not raise their pay. After several weeks, the people who neededto ride the bus to work said, “A plague […]...
18. You might be a redneck if 05 You might be a redneck if… You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin’ dog. You’re an expert on worm beds. The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. Your wife has ever said, “Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!” Your family tree […]...
19. Love handles One day as Monica Lewinsky was walking along the beach awaiting her Senate trial testimony, she came upon an ornate bottle that had washed up on shore. Curious, she picked it up, brushed off the sand, and lo and behold a genie popped out. “Greetings, Miss Lewinsky,” the genie said. “Since you have released me, […]...
20. Returning from her vacation Returning from her vacation, the young secretary was telling anyone who would listen about what a fun time she had. She then asked for two weeks leave in which to get married. “But you just had two weeks off,” said the boss. “Why didn’t you get married then?” “What and ruin my vacation?” she whined....
21. Eight weeks to a better brain Meditation study shows changes associated with awareness, stress. Participating in an eight-week mindfulness meditation program appears to make measurable changes in brain regions associated with memory, sense of self, empathy, and stress. In a study that will appear in the Jan. 30 issue of Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, a team led by Harvard-affiliated researchers at Massachusetts […]...
22. The cost of a brain A man went to a brain store to get some brain to complete a study. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brain offerred at this particular brain store. He begins to question the butcher about the cost of these brains. “How much does it cost for engineer brain?” “Three dollars an […]...
23. A fortunate twist of fate Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physicals. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed incredibly long, oversized penises. “How do you account for this?” he asked the brothers. “It’s hereditary, sir,” the older one replied. “I see,” said the doctor, writing in his file. “Your […]...
24. Значение идиомы look up to [look up to] {v.} To think of as a good example to copy;honor; respect. Mr. Smith had taught for many years, and all thestudents looked up to him. Young children look up to older ones, so older children should be good examples....
25. The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. “What would you like to do next?” he asked. “I wanna be weighed,” she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guessed. “One-twelve,” said […]...
26. Reaching the end of a job interview Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer fresh out of MIT, “And what starting salary were you looking for?” The engineer said, “In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.” The interviewer said, “Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks […]...
27. Take her apart! A young boy asked his mother “Ma, is it true that people can be taken apart like machines?” “Of course not, where did you hear such nonsense?” replied by his mother The young boy answered ” The other day, Daddy was talking to someone on the phone, and he said that he screwed the ass […]...
28. The young playboy took a blind date to an The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. “What would you like to do next?” he asked. “I wanna be weighed,” she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser. “One-twelve,” said […]...
29. During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red faced colonel at the wheel. “Your jeep stuck, sir?” asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. “Nope,” replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, “*Yours* is.”...
30. Значение идиомы big wheel [big wheel] {n.}, {informal} An influential or important person who has the power to do things and has connections in high places. Uncle Ferdinand is a big wheel in Washington; maybe he can help you with your problem....
31. For his wife’s birthday party, a doctor ordered a cake For his wife’s birthday party, a doctor ordered a cake with this inscription: “You are not getting older, You are just getting better.” When asked how he wanted it arranged, he said, “Just put ‘You are not getting older’ at the top, and ‘You are just getting better’ at the bottom.” It wasn’t until the […]...
32. Перевод слова strong Strong – сильный, крепкий, твердый Перевод слова Strong will – сильная воля strong constitution – крепкое здоровье strong denial – решительный отказ He’s as Strong as an ox. Он силен, как бык. He was a big Strong man. Он был большим и сильным человеком. Tact isn’t my Strong point. Тактичность не является моей отличительной чертой. […]...
33. Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6 Two young brothers, aged 5 and 6, are listening through the keyhole as their older sister is getting it on with her new boyfriend. They hear her say, “Oh, Jim, you’re going where no man has gone before!” The six-year-old says to his brother, “He must be fucking her up the ass!”...
34. During WW II an American soldier During WW II an American soldier had been on the front lines in Europe for three months, when he was finally given a week of R&R. He caught a supply boat to a supply base in the south of England, then caught a train to London. The train was extremely crowded and he could not […]...
35. An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady and they are very much in love. However, no matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi. The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the […]...
36. Значение идиомы grab off [grab off] {v.}, {informal} To take quickly; take or grab beforeanybody else can; choose for yourself. The people who got to theshow first grabbed off the best seats. The women hurried to thestore to grab off the things on sale. The prettiest girls at thedance were grabbed off for partners first. Compare: SNAP UP....
37. Smart decision Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked […]...
38. Bending it further The old man was saying to his doctor, “You know, Doc, when I was young, it was as hard as a rock. As I got a little older, I could bend it a little and now I can bend it alot. Does that mean I’m getting stronger?”...
39. At the ripe old age of 77, grandpa had decided to marry At the ripe old age of 77, grandpa had decided to marry a young girl of 20. Grandpa’s doctor tried to explain that at his age sex with a young girl could be dangerous, even fatal. Grandpa, not the slightest bit perturbed replied “Oh well, if she dies, I’ll just get myself another one.”...
40. Confessions Three young women are at a cocktail party. The conversation turns to their position in life, and it’s clear that they’re trying to one-up each other. The first one says, “My husband is taking me to the French Riviera for two weeks on vacation,” and then looks at the others with a superior demeanor. The […]...