A real bastard

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1. Little Johnny had become a real nuisance Little Johnny had become a real nuisance while his father tried to concentrate on his Saturday afternoon poker game with friends and relatives. His father tried every way possible to get Johnny to occupy himself…television, ice cream, homework, video games…but the youngster insisted on running back and forth behind the players and calling out the […]...
2. England Jokes Q: What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer. – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – […]...
3. Перевод слова real Real – реальный, настоящий, действительный Перевод слова Real events – реальные события real life – действительность real gold – настоящее золото the real reason – истинная причина She’s a Real peach. Она настоящая красавица. It looks Real nice. Это выглядит действительно хорошо. I remember my first Real job. Я помню свою первую настоящую работу....
4. Little Lucy was playing in the garden when she Little Lucy was playing in the garden when she spotted two spiders mating. “Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?” “They’re mating, Lucy” he replied. “What do you call the spider on top Daddy?” Lucy asked. “Oh, that’s a Daddy Longlegs. Lucy asked, “Oh, so one’s a Daddy Longlegs and the other one is a […]...
5. Значение идиомы for real [for real ] {adj. phr.}, {informal} Not practice or play;earnest, real, serious. The war games were over now. This battlewas for real....
6. Watch real baseball Top Ten Signs you’re Not Watching a Real Baseball Team From Late Show with David Letterman; Monday, February 20, 1995 You recognize batter as the kid who sold you a hot dog a couple minutes earlier. Everytime a player slides into second, he busts his hip. They keep shouting “Do over!” When umpire yells, “Strike […]...
7. Your father is drunk To The Tune Of Santa Claus Is Coming To Town Oh you better not shout, you better not cry, You better not pout, I’m tellin’ you why, Daddy’s home and I think he’s drunk. He’s walkin’ real slow, he slurs when he speaks, I don’t even think he’s shaved in two weeks, Daddy’s home and […]...
8. Перевод сленгового выражения for real, значение и пример использования Сленговое выражение: for real Перевод: серьезно, по-настоящему (обычно употребляется в качестве вопроса, чтобы переспросить собеседника и убедиться, что он говорит серьезно) Пример: “I got an A on my paper.” “Are you for real?” “For real.” – Мне поставили пять за работу. – Ты серьезно? – Серьезно. “I just won the lottery.” “For real?” Я только […]...
9. The Cesium song 07 Yesterday, I had Cesium with which to play. Now all my fingers have been blown away. And silence reigns since yesterday. Suddenly, I’m just half the man I used to be. I have no eyes with which to see. My legs have parted company. Why she had to blow, I don’t know, I can only […]...
10. This fellow comes to confession This fellow comes to confession. “Father, he said, forgive me for I have sinned.” The priest asked, “What did you do, my son?” “I lusted,” the fellow replied. “Tell me about it,” the priest said. The fellow then related his story. “Father, I am a deliveryman for UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in […]...
11. Перевод слова awful Awful – ужасный, отвратительный Перевод слова Awful manners – ужасные манеры awful tragedy – ужасная трагедия awful truth – страшная правда My old boss was Awful! Мой прежний босс был ужасен! That joke is just Awful. Эта шутка – просто ужас. I’m Awful sorry. Я ужасно извиняюсь....
12. I have a question A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, “How does this boat float? The father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.” A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, “How do fish […]...
13. An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight, so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: “Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this […]...
14. There was an old woman on a plane, sitting next to the Pope There was an old woman on a plane, sitting next to the Pope. It was stormy outside, and the plane was being rocked by some severe turbulence. So this kindly old lady looked upon Death’s door, and said to her papal neighbour. ‘Father, surely you can do something about this…’ To which the Pope replied, […]...
15. Late one night, little Johnny woke up to the some loud noises Late one night, little Johnny woke up to the some loud noises coming from his parents’ bedroom. He got out of bed and walked down the hall towards his parents room. Before he made it to the end of the hall, the noises had ceased and the bathroom light had gone on. Little Johnny walked […]...
16. The last request Father O’Grady was saying his goodbyes to the parishioners after his Sunday morning service as he always does when Mary Clancey came up to him in tears. “What’s bothering you so, dear?” inquired Farther O’Grady. “Oh, father, I’ve got terrible news.” Replied Mary. “Well what is it, Mary?” “Well, my husband, passed away last night, […]...
17. One day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughter One day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughter and beeped his car horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation. He said, “I did that by accident.” She replied, “I know that, daddy.” He replied, “How’d you know?” The girl said, “Because you didn’t say ‘ASSHOLE!’ afterwards!”...
18. Перевод сленгового выражения the real McCoy, значение и пример использования Сленговое выражение: the real McCoy Перевод: настоящая вещь, не подделка Пример: They claim this to be the real McCoy, not a fake one. Они говорят, что эта вещь настоящая, а не подделка. Примечание: очевидно происходит от имени известного боксера, у которого было много имитаторов, которые выдавали себя за него...
19. Pecuniary reasons A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father asked, “Does this fellow have any money?” The daughter shook her head sadly. “Oh Daddy! You men are all alike.” sighing deeply, she replied, “That’s exactly what he asked me about you.”...
20. Having the equipment A couple went on vacation to a resort up north. The husband liked to fish, and the wife liked to read. One morning the husband came back from fishing after getting up real early that morning and took a nap. While he slept, the wife decided to take the boat out. She was not familiar […]...
21. Two Irish lads had been out shacking up with their Two Irish lads had been out shacking up with their girl friends. One felt guilty and decided he should stop at the church and confess. He went into the confession booth and told the Father, “Father, I have sinned. I have committed fornication with a lady. Please forgive me.” The Father said, “Tell me who […]...
22. Перевод слова lady Lady – леди, женщина Перевод слова Great lady – знатная дама you’ve dropped your gloves, lady! – женщина, вы обронили перчатки! foxy lady – соблазнительная женщина your good lady – ваша супруга Shall we rejoin the Ladies? Не вернуться ли нам к дамам? She’s swell, a real Lady. Она одевается стильно, как настоящая леди. Don’t […]...
23. Значение идиомы have kittens [have kittens] {v. phr.}, {slang} To become very much worried orupset. Mrs. Jones was having kittens because if was very late andSusan wasn’t home yet. Compare: HAVE A FIT....
24. A veterinarian surgeon A veterinarian surgeon had had a hell of a day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner, after which they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, […]...
25. Passing a parrot A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.” Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same […]...
26. Sister Mary burst into the office of the principal Sister Mary burst into the office of the principal of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion parochial school in an advanced state of agitation. “Father!” she cried, “just WAIT until you hear this!” The priest led the sister to a chair, and said, ” Now just calm down and tell me what has you so excited?” […]...
27. Father, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one day Father, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one day. So they set off and are seeing lots of animals. Eventually they end up opposite the elephant house. The boy looks at the elephant, sees its willy, points to it and says, “Mummy, what is that long thing?” His mother replies, “That, son, […]...
28. Значение идиомы big daddy [big daddy] {n.}, {slang}, {informal} The most important, largest thing, person or animal in a congregation of similar persons, animals, or objects. The whale is the big daddy of everything that swims in the ocean. The H-bomb is the big daddy of all modern weapons. Al Capone was the big daddy of organized crime in […]...
29. A technical bastard A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about to leave, and asked him to marry them. He asked if they had a license and, when they didn’t, sent them off to get one. They caught the town clerk just as he was locking up, […]...
30. Doing the right thing Son : Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. Mum : Well, you have done the right thing. Son : But mom, I was sitting on daddy’s lap....
31. A LIGHTER LOOK AT MARRIAGE Getting married is very much like going to a continental restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, “Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?” The other replied, […]...
32. Диалог на английском языке с переводом “Oh, come on, get real” Alaric Аларик I’ve decided to run in this year’s charity marathon. Я решил принять участие в благотворительном марафоне в этом году. Gilbert Гилберт You mean the one they’re holding in two months’ time? Ты имеешь в виду тот, который будет через два месяца? Alaric Аларик Yes, I think I could get round in about six […]...
33. Humor about the Irishmen There is a story about the Irishman who drowned while he was digging a grave for a friend. He’d wanted to be buried at sea. “Well, Mrs. O’Connor, so you want a divorce?” the solicitor questioned his client. “Tell me about it. Do you have a grudge?” “Oh, no,” replied Mrs. O’Connor. “Shure now, we […]...
34. Sweet, Sweet Road Rage An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new red Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. The little old lady was so upset that she went up to the man and said, “I was going to park there!” The […]...
35. Attempts by the dumb SIX DIE TRYING TO SAVE CHICKEN – August 1, 1995 CAIRO, Egypt (AP) – Six people drowned yesterday while trying to rescue a chicken that had fallen into a well in southern Egypt. An 18-year-old farmer was the first to descend into the 60-foot well. He drowned, apparently after an undercurrent in the water pulled […]...
36. The golf course A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on. He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole, and you’re a hole behind me, so you […]...
37. The wedding is offno on! All the farmers for a hundred miles around were attending the wedding of a young Australian couple. Waiting for things to get started, they were somewhat shocked to see the bride’s father storm up the aisle, jacket off, sleeves rolled up, and obviously very angry. “The weddin’s off,” he shouted, “Everybody bugger off!” Dismayed and […]...
38. A boy finished cutting the lawn of a priest A boy finished cutting the lawn of a priest…the grass was very thick and long, and it took the boy about 4 hours to cut. He approached the Father for payment and the priest paid him $1.00. The boy said “Thank you, virgin Father!” The priest replied, “What did you say?” The boy repeated, “Thank […]...
39. Значение идиомы laughing matter [laughing matter] {n.} A funny happening; a silly situation. – Usually used with “no”. John’s failing the test is no laughingmatter! We were amused when our neighbor’s cat had five kittens, but when our own cat had six kittens it was no laughing matter....
40. A little boy and his dad are standing in line A little boy and his dad are standing in line at the grocery store behind a big fat lady. The little boy says, “hey dad, look how fat that lady is!” “Shhhh, quiet son, she’ll hear you.” “But dad, look how big and fat that lady is!” “Shhhhhh, don’t say that son, it’s not nice!” […]...