A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken

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1. A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlightsA lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and considerable damage. There’s no sign of the offending vehicle but he’s relieved to see that there’s a note stuck under the windshield wiper. «Sorry. I just backed into your Beemer. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding and smiling at me ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова brokenBroken — разбитый, сломанный Перевод слова Broken leg — сломанная нога broken stone — щебень broken food — объедки, оставшиеся на столе Her spirit was Broken. Ее дух был сломлен. My Broken leg is mending. Моя сломанная нога идет на поправку. I become a Broken vessel. Я как разбитое корыто. Интересные факты «Сломленные» (Broken) — ... Читать далее...
3. Перевод слова lawyerLawyer — адвокат, юрист Перевод слова A lawyer by profession — юрист по профессии lawyer’s clients — клиенты адвоката lawyer practice, practice of law — юридическая практика You should see a Lawyer. Вы должны увидеться с адвокатом. You should talk to a Lawyer. Вам следует проконсультироваться с юристом. I got a letter from my Lawyer. ... Читать далее...
4. A lawyer passed on and found himself in HeavenA lawyer passed on and found himself in Heaven, but not at all happy with his accommodations. He complained to St. Peter, who told him that his only recourse was to appeal his assignment. The lawyer immediately advised that he intended to appeal, but was then told that he would be waiting at least three ... Читать далее...
5. A man walked into a lawyer’s office andA man walked into a lawyer’s office and inquired about the rates. «Fifty dollars for three questions,» replied the lawyer. «Isn’t that awfully steep?» asked the man. «Yes,» the lawyer replied, «and what was your third question?»...
6. A lawyer and the pope were both killed in an accidentA lawyer and the pope were both killed in an accident. The two were in line to see St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter asked the lawyer his name and looked it up in his book. He then asked the Pope for his name, and looked it up in his book also. «Now, ... Читать далее...
7. On visting a seriously ill lawyer in the hospitalOn visting a seriously ill lawyer in the hospital, his friend found him sitting up in the bed, frantically leafing through the bible «What are you doing?» asked the friend. «Looking for loopholes,» repied the lawyer....
8. A priest and a lawyer are walking downA priest and a lawyer are walking down the street and see a small boy eating an ice cream. The priest says, «How’d you like to fuck that?» To which the lawyer replied, «Out of what?»...
9. A lawyer named Strange diedA lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, «Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer.» The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative: ... Читать далее...
10. Broken leg«How did it happen?» the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man’s broken leg. «Well, doc, 25 years ago…» «Never mind the past! Tell me how you broke your leg this morning.» «Like I was saying… 25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, that night, right after I’d ... Читать далее...
11. Visiting a lawyer for advice, the wife saidVisiting a lawyer for advice, the wife said, «I want you to help me get a divorce. The Lawyer says OK, what are your grounds. My husband is getting a little queer to sleep with.» «What do you mean?» asked the attorney. «Does he force you to indulge in unusual sex practices?» «No,» replied the ... Читать далее...
12. Dealing with a lawyerA new York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him «What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?» The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, «A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street.» Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in ... Читать далее...
13. Перевод идиомы sound like a broken record, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: sound like a broken record Перевод: говорить одно и то же снова и снова, как пластинка, которую заело Пример: The boy’s mother sounds like a broken record when she tells him to clean his room. Мать мальчика все повторяет, как пластинка, которую заело, чтобы он прибрал свою комнату....
14. A teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly GatesRecently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question. St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, «What was the name of the ship that crashed into the iceberg? They ... Читать далее...
15. A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuitA big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace ... Читать далее...
16. Love JesusBy Dennis DiPasquale The other day I went to the local religious book store, where I saw a HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car, and I’m really glad I did. What an uplifting experience followed. I was stopped at the light ... Читать далее...
17. A lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy manA lawyer and two friends, a Rabbi and a Hindu holy man, had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer. The farmer said, «There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep, one of you must sleep in the barn.» «No problem,» ... Читать далее...
18. Dedicated geologistsTotal immersion geologists Total immersion geologists: Are you totally obsessed with geology? If so, then you are a total immersion geologist. Here are the ten warning signs: 1. You judge a restaurant by the type of decorative building stone they use rather than their food. 2. You manage to turn any conversation into a discussion ... Читать далее...
19. Mending a Broken HeartDavid: Why has Joyce been Moping around all week? What’s wrong with her? Victoria: She’s Suffering from a broken heart. Her boyfriend Broke up with her over the weekend. They had been together for two years. David: Did she tell you the Gruesome details? Victoria: Not really. She just said that she’s feeling Depressed and ... Читать далее...
20. Question and answerQ: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung? A: You can’t get a finger between the rope and his neck! Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do? A: ... Читать далее...
21. Диалог на английском языке с переводом «Между юристом и клиентом (Between Lawyer And Client)»По-английски Перевод на русский Lawyer: Good afternoon. How can I help you? Юрист: Добрый день. Чем могу вам помочь? Client: Good afternoon. I need some help concerning my company. And I need it from the competent person. Клиент: Добрый день. Мне нужна помощь относительно моей компании. И мне требуется для этого компетентный человек. Lawyer: My ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы getaway car[getaway car] {n. phr.} A vehicle parked near the scene of a crimein which the criminals escape. The police intercepted the getawaycar at a major crossroads....
23. An old man was critically illAn old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. «I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?» «It’s $50,000,» the lawyer said. «But why? You’ll be dead soon, why do you want to become a lawyer?» «That’s my business! ... Читать далее...
24. Перевод слова vehicleVehicle — транспортное средство Перевод слова An overage vehicle — устаревшее транспортное средство private vehicle — частный, личный автомобиль five-passenger vehicle — пятиместное транспортное средство Do I need to take out insurance on my Vehicle? Нужно ли мне приобретать страховку на мой автомобиль? Their Vehicle was crushed by an army tank. Их машину раздавил боевой ... Читать далее...
25. Mega moron awardsMEGA MORON AWARDS Tennessee: A man successfully broke into a bank after hours and stole the bank’s video camera, while the camera was remotely recording. (That is, the videotape recorder was located elsewhere in the bank, so he didn’t get the videotape of himself stealing the camera). Louisiana: A man walked into a Circle-K, put ... Читать далее...
26. In a long line of people waiting for a bank tellerIn a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, «Just what the hell you are doing?» «Well,» said the guy, «you see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you ... Читать далее...
27. I just needed to use your carAfter shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, ... Читать далее...
28. Моя будущая профессия — юрист/ My Future Profession Is A LawyerНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык My Future Profession Is A Lawyer Моя будущая профессия — юрист It is rather important for everyone to make the right choice of profession, because what we choose defines the largest part of our life. If someone chooses to be a teacher, he or she will spend most ... Читать далее...
29. Я хочу стать юристом/ I Want To Become A LawyerНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык I Want To Become A Lawyer Я хочу стать юристом It is very important for everyone to choose the right career. Most part of the adult life is connected with work. It’s ideal when it brings pleasure, not disappointment. When I was five, I wanted to become a ... Читать далее...
30. GuiltyScene: A court room in Oklahoma where a person is on trial for murder. There is strong evidence indicating guilt; however, there is no corpse. In the defense’s closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client is guilty and that it looks like he’ll probably be convicted, resorts to a clever trick. «Ladies and gentlemen ... Читать далее...
31. Значение идиомы get stuck[get stuck] {v. phr.} 1. To be victimized; be cheated. TheSmiths sure got stuck when they bought that secondhand car; it brokedown just two days after they got it. 2. To become entrapped orembroiled in a physical, emotional, or social obstacle so as to beunable to free oneself. Last winter our car got stuck in ... Читать далее...
32. Very fair paymentAn elderly and somewhat hard-of-hearing man was sitting in a stylish downtown attorney’s office as his lawyer handed him his will. «Your estate is very complex,» said the lawyer, «but I’ve made sure that all of your wishes will be executed. Due to the complexity, my fee is $4500.» Just then, the phone rang and ... Читать далее...
33. One day Clinton goes to the bathroomOne day Clinton goes to the bathroom, pulls down his pants, and much to his amazement, he finds a red ring around his penis. So the next day he goes to his physician and the doctor says, «I cant figure out what it is. So I’ll give you some medicine, and if it doesn’t work, ... Читать далее...
34. Reporting a Stolen CarKenji: Hello, my car was Stolen and I want to report it. Officer: Where was it when it was stolen? Kenji: It was parked outside of my apartment building. I went outside this morning to drive to work, and it was gone. Officer: Okay, you need to fill out this form. Put down the Make ... Читать далее...
35. Fighting a Parking TicketMindy: Hey, where are you going? Eric: I’m going to Traffic court. I got a parking Ticket and I’m going to Fight it. Mindy: How much was the Fine? Eric: It was Only $40. But it’s not the money, it’s the Principle of the thing. Mindy: Why? Weren’t you parked Illegally? Eric: No, I wasn‚Aot. ... Читать далее...
36. Перевод слова noteNote — заметка, записка; банкнта Перевод слова Critical notes — критические заметки short-hand notes — стенограмма notes on Tacitus — комментарии к Тациту a note of thanks — благодарственное письмо Did you read my Note? — Uh-huh. Ты читала мою записку? — Угу. Can you change a £20 Note? Вы можете разменять банкноту в 20 ... Читать далее...
37. Wife comes home to find the old manWife comes home to find the old man humping the dog in the front room. «My God Henry», she screams, «I know you’ve had other woman but this time you’ve gone too far!» «You may be right» he says, «I think I’m stuck.»...
38. Wife comes home to find the old man shagging the dogWife comes home to find the old man shagging the dog in the front room. «My God Henry», she screams, «I know you’ve had other woman but this time you’ve gone too far!» «You may be right» he says, «I think I’m stuck.»...
39. The scene is a dark jungle in AfricaThe scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through the brush when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, «Hey! Cut it out, alright!» The rear tiger says, «sorry,» and they continue. ... Читать далее...
40. Hope never diesA man driving outside of Baltimore, Maryland was southbound on Interstate 95 in the far right hand lane traveling at 55 mph, minding his own business. He noticed in his rear view mirror that a Maryland State Trooper was right behind him. A mile later nothing changed, except now he’s driving at 65 mph, the ... Читать далее...