A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm

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1. Lost In The SnowA blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. «If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow plow and follow it.» Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for ... Читать далее...
2. A blonde walked into a doctor’s office with a hole in her handA blonde walked into a doctor’s office with a hole in her hand. The doctor told her that he had to report all gunshot wounds, and this was an obvious gunshot wound, so would she please explain how it happened? The blonde said, «Well, to be honest with you, I was trying to commit suicide, ... Читать далее...
3. One day a blonde went into Wal-Mart andOne day a blonde went into Wal-Mart and saw something she liked. The Blonde asked the clerk what it was. The Clerk said it was a thermous. What does the thermous do? It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold. So she bought one. The blonde brought it to work one day and the ... Читать далее...
4. Blonde on blondeA blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde’s driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. «What does it look like?» she finally ... Читать далее...
5. This snow plow driver from North DakotaThis snow plow driver from North Dakota got married. He and his new Bride prepared for their wedding nite. He watched for a while as she spread three different kinds of creams and then a white foam in preparation for their love making. She finally announced that she was ready. The man then asked if ... Читать далее...
6. A blonde came running home to her motherA blonde came running home to her mother, sobbing and hysterical. «What’s wrong?» her mum, (another blonde) asked. «My boyfriend’s just dropped me!» wailed the blonde. Her mother nodded wisely and started to tell her all about the birds and the bees. «No mum,» the blonde interrupted. «You don’t understand — I can fuck and ... Читать далее...
7. A BlondeA Blonde A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, «I’ve kidnapped you.» She then wrote a note saying, «I’ve kidnapped your kid. ... Читать далее...
8. A blonde decided that she was tired of her empty lifeA blonde decided that she was tired of her empty life. She cut her hair and dyed it brown, and set off for a drive. She wanted to do random acts of kindness to see if it would change her life. While driving through the countryside, she came across a farmer who was trying to ... Читать далее...
9. Значение идиомы snow in[snow in] {v.} To block up or trap by much snow; keep inside, After the storm the farmer and his family were snowed in for threedays. The train went off the track and the passengers were snowedin for several days....
10. Значение идиомы weather the storm[weather the storm] {v. phr.} To survive some disaster. WhenPeter and Sue started their business they had very little money, butin a year they weathered the storm....
11. A Destructive StormAllen: Are you all right? Monica: Yes, we’re fine, but that Blizzard really Caught us off guard, especially this time of year. Have you seen the news? Allen: I just watched it. Overnight, the storm Felled over 30 trees in and around the town and Toppled utility lines. City officials are saying that some Residents ... Читать далее...
12. A blonde walks into the police department looking for a jobA blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions…. Officer: What’s 2+2? Blonde: Ummmmm… 4! Officer: What’s the square root of 100? Blonde: Ummmm… 10! Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln? Blonde: Ummmm… I dunno. Officer: Well, you can go home and think ... Читать далее...
13. A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly beingA blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her «go do something to prove them wrong! Why don’t you learn all the state capitals or something?» The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying. The next party she ... Читать далее...
14. Перевод слова stormStorm — буря, шторм, гроза; бушевать, свирепствовать Перевод слова A storm is brewing — гроза собирается storm cloud — грозовая туча to be storming at the delay — горячиться из-за опоздания A Storm is coming on. Надвигается шторм. Any port in a Storm. В бурю любая гавань хороша. She Stormed into the office. Она ворвалась ... Читать далее...
15. Значение идиомы take by storm[take by storm] {v. phr.} 1. To capture by a sudden or very boldattack. The army did not hesitate. They took the town by storm. 2.To win the favor or liking of; make like orbelieve you. The comic took the audience by storm. John gaveJane so much attention that he took her by storm, and ... Читать далее...
16. A blonde is speaking to her psychiatristA blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. «I’m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me.» Psychiatrist: «Don’t you have a phone in your car?» Blonde: «That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car.» Psychiatrist: ... Читать далее...
17. A blonde decides to try horseback ridingA blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and then horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, ... Читать далее...
18. A blonde went to the appliance store saleA blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. «I would like to buy this TV,» she told the salesman. «Sorry we don’t sell to blondes,» he replied. She hurried home, dyed her hair, came back again and told the salesman, «I would like to buy this TV.» «Sorry we don’t sell ... Читать далее...
19. Перевод слова snowSnow — снег, снегопад Перевод слова To be caught in the snow — застрять из-за метели sticky snow — липкий снег fall of snow — выпадение снега It is Snowing. Идет снег. Perhaps it will Snow tomorrow. Возможно, завтра будет снег. Snow is falling in profusion. Снег валит в изобилии. Интересные факты В сериале «Игра ... Читать далее...
20. A blonde with two red ears went to her doctorA blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, «I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang — but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.» «Oh Dear!» the ... Читать далее...
21. Значение идиомы any port in a storm[any port in a storm] Any help is welcome in an emergency. — A proverb. The motel we stopped in was nothing to brag about, but we were so exhausted that it was a clear case of any port in a storm....
22. A buxom blonde wore, at a charity ball, an enormous diamondA buxom blonde wore, at a charity ball, an enormous diamond. «It happens to be the third most famous diamond in the whole world,» she boasted. «The first is the Hope Diamond, then comes the Kohinoor, and then comes this one, which is called Lipshitz.» «What a diamond!» «How lucky you are!» «Wait, wait, nothing ... Читать далее...
23. Being in a Severe StormShana: Hey, did you hear that? There’s a Severe storm coming. Let’s hope for the best. Aecio: Yeah, I hope it doesn’t leave a lot of damage. We haven’t recovered from the Aftermath of the last big storm. Shana: No, when I said I was hoping for the best, I meant I’m hoping to catch ... Читать далее...
24. A blonde and a brunette were talking one dayA blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette said that her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him «Head and Shoulders» and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively, «How do you give shoulders?»...
25. Значение идиомы get lost[get lost] {v. phr.}, {slang} Go away! — Used as a command. Getlost! I want to study. John told Bert to get lost. Compare: DROPDEAD....
26. Пословица / поговорка any port in a storm — перевод и значение, пример использованияПословица / поговорка: any port in a storm Перевод: в бурю любая гавань хороша Эквивалент в русском языке: в беде любой выход хорош Пример: There was a bad storm so the ship went to the nearest port. It was any port in a storm. Была сильная буря, поэтому корабль зашел в ближайший порт. В бурю ... Читать далее...
27. A blonde named Vikki decides she wants to tryA blonde named Vikki decides she wants to try horseback riding one day. So Vikki mounts the horse, taps its butt, and the horse starts to take off at a reasonable speed. She is having fun, and decides she wants to go a little faster, so she kicks the horses butt, and the horse goes ... Читать далее...
28. A blonde goes for a job interviewA blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer decides to start with the basics. ‘So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?’ The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying, ‘Ehhhh.. 22!’ The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. ‘And can you ... Читать далее...
29. A young blonde woman is distraughtA young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband ... Читать далее...
30. A blonde bought two horses, and could never rememberA blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse’s tail and our friend was stuck ... Читать далее...
31. An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doingAn Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, «Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.» The Mexican opened ... Читать далее...
32. Three altar boys are standing in the snow withThree altar boys are standing in the snow with their pants down around their ankles. They have their penis’ in a snow bank. Sister Margaret sticks her head out the window and says, «Boys! Boys! Whatever are you doing… you’re going to catch pneumonia. Put your penis’ away.» The tallest altar boy turns around and ... Читать далее...
33. Значение идиомы snow under[snow under] {v.} 1. To cover over with snow. The doghouse wassnowed under during the blizzard. 2. {informal} To give so much ofsomething that it cannot be taken care of; to weigh down by so much ofsomething that’ you cannot do anything about it. — Usually used in thepassive. The factory received so many orders ... Читать далее...
34. A couple of blonde men in a pickup truckA couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, «We need some four-by-twos.» The clerk said, «You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?» The man said, «I’ll go check,» and went back to the truck. He returned a minute later and said, ... Читать далее...
35. A blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded womanA blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The brunette came in first, the redhead second. The blonde woman finally reached shore completely exhausted. After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked: «I don’t want to complain, but I think those ... Читать далее...
36. Значение идиомы sell snow to the Eskimos[sell snow to the Eskimos] {v. phr.} To sell something to peoplewho already have a large quantity of the same or similar goods. MyAlaskan friend said, «One of the hottest businesses in Alaska isrefrigeration. You could say that I, as a refrigerator expert, amselling snow to the Eskimos.» See: CARRY COALS TO NEWCASTLE....
37. A snow town — Город из снегаMy name is Vika Vishnjakova and I live in a very small town somewhere behind the Polar circle. I study English at school №6 and I am a student of the 7th form. Very often I spend my summer holidays in summer camps near the Black Sea or the Azov Sea. I like it very ... Читать далее...
38. Значение идиомы snow job[snow job] {n.}, {slang}, {informal} 1. Insincere or exaggeratedtalk designed to gain the favors of someone. Joe gave Sue a snowjob and she believed every word of it. 2. The skillful display oftechnical vocabulary and prestige terminology in order to pass oneselfoff as an expert in a specialized field without really being aknowledgeable worker in ... Читать далее...
39. Three women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blondeThree women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde, all come home from work at the same time and get on the elevator. The brunette notices a blob on the elevator wall and says: » OOOOOhhh that looks like semen.» She reaches out and touches the blob with her fingers and says «It feels like ... Читать далее...
40. A small boy was lost at a large shopping mallA small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, «I’ve lost my dad!» The cop asked, «What’s he like?» The little boy replied, «Beer and women with big tits.»...