3 pregnant women were waiting

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1. A pregnant woman is about to give birthA pregnant woman is about to give birth. The doctor has her on the delivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the top of a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and says to the doctor, «Are you my dad?». The doctor says, «No, I am your doctor!». ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова pregnantPregnant — беременная; полный смысла, важный Перевод слова Pregnant woman — беременная женщина mature pregnant cow — взрослая стельная корова pregnant years — годы, насыщенные важными событиями words pregnant with meaning — слова, полные глубокого смысла She was heavily Pregnant. Она была на последних месяцах беременности. She’s Pregnant with their first child. Она беременна их ... Читать далее...
3. The room was full of pregnant women and their partnersThe room was full of pregnant women and their partners. The Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, and informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. «Ladies, exercise is good for you,» announced the teacher. «Walking is especially ... Читать далее...
4. A pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digestedA pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digested, then suddenly a whiskey came along. Pizza thought:»Ok. I’ll let him pass, there’s no hurry. Two minutes later another whiskey comes by and pizza let him pass too, but two minutes later when the next one got there, pizza stoped him:»What’s going on out there?» ... Читать далее...
5. Two old women were sitting on a bench waiting for their busTwo old women were sitting on a bench waiting for their bus. The buses were running late, and a lot of time passed. Finally, one woman turned to the other and said, «You know, I’ve been sitting here so long, my butt fell asleep!’. The other woman turned to her and said «I know! I ... Читать далее...
6. 4 Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV4 Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV. The first one said she wanted to watch the INDY 500. The second one wanted to watch the sexy Shawn Michels on WWF. The third nun said she wanted to watch the knitting channel so she can knit some mittens for the kitchen. The fourth nun ... Читать далее...
7. The people are waitingUpon returning to their car from a shopping tour, one of the young ladies realized that she had forgotten to stop at the pharmacy for her birth control pills. She rushed into the nearest pharmacy and gave her prescription to the pharmacist. «Please fill this immediately,» she asked. «I’ve got people waiting in my car!»...
8. Alcohol vs WomenA guy says, «I remember the first time I used alcohol as a substitute for women.» «Yeah what happened?» asked the other. The first guy replies, «Well, I got my penis stuck in the neck of the bottle.»...
9. A substitute for womenA guy says, «I remember the first time I used alcohol as a substitute for women.» «Yeah what happened?» asked his friend. The first guy replies, «Well, er, I got my penis stuck in the neck of the bottle.»...
10. One day a lady went to the doctors officeOne day a lady went to the doctor’s office and told the doctor that her husband wasn’t interested in her any more he just wouldn’t have sex with her anymore. So the doctor went into the back of the shop and got a bottle of 100 pills. He told her that «if you give your ... Читать далее...
11. A woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnantA woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions. She replies, «Well, I’m a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?» The doctor answered, «Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy ... Читать далее...
12. Значение идиомы waiting list[waiting list] {n.} A list of persons waiting to get into something. The nursery school enrollment was complete, so thedirector put our child’s name on the waiting list. The landlordsaid there were no vacant apartments available, but that he would putthe Rogers’ name on the waiting list....
13. Перевод слова handbagHandbag — дамская сумочка Перевод слова Beaded handbag — бисерная сумочка ladies’ handbag — дамская сумка pouchette handbag — сумочка на завязках I’ve got far too much clobber in my Handbag. У меня в сумке слишком много всякого хлама. She roundhouseed Smith with a Handbag. Она ударила Смита наотмашь сумочкой. She propped the mirror against ... Читать далее...
14. Перевод слова tabletTablet — таблетка, табличка Перевод слова Aspirin tablet — таблетка аспирина clay tablet — глиняная табличка marble tablet — мраморная плита Their names are engraved on a stone Tablet. Их имена выгравированы на каменной плите. Dissolve the Tablet in water. Растворите таблетку в воде. The label says to take one Tablet before meals. На этикетке ... Читать далее...
15. Перевод слова bottleBottle — бутылка Перевод слова To drink a whole bottle — выпить целую бутылку to bottle a beverage — разливать напиток по бутылкам to fill a bottle — наполнить бутылку Has the baby finished her Bottle yet? Малыш уже выпил свою бутылочку? Between us, we drank three Bottles of wine. Между нами, мы выпили три ... Читать далее...
16. Brenda, pregnant with her first child, was paying a visit toBrenda, pregnant with her first child, was paying a visit to her obstetrician’s office. When the exam was over, she shyly began, «My husband wants me to ask you…» «I know, I know.» the doctor said, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder, «I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late ... Читать далее...
17. Значение идиомы play a waiting game[play a waiting game] {v. phr.} To withhold action until one’schances for success improve. Ray would like to be vice president ofthe company so he is playing a waiting game in the hope that thepresident will soon recognize his abilities....
18. Значение идиомы waiting room[waiting room] {n. phr.} The sitting area in a doctor’s, lawyer’s, accountant’s, etc. office, or in a hospital, or other workplace, wherepeople wait their turn. Some doctor’s offices have elegantlyfurnished waiting rooms with magazines, newspapers, and coffee for thepatients....
19. A use for ViagraA man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital. «How are you grandpa?» he asks. «Feeling fine,» says the old man. «What’s the food like?» «Terrific, wonderful menus.» «And the nursing?» «Just couldn’t be better. These young nurses really take care of you.» «What about sleeping? Do you sleep okay?» «No problem at ... Читать далее...
20. Getting in an accidentA Rabbi and a Priest are driving one day and, by a freak accident, have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither of the clerics has a scratch on him. After they crawl out of their cars, the rabbi sees the priest’s collar and says, «So you’re a ... Читать далее...
21. At the PharmacyI went to the Drugstore down the street To fill a prescription at the Pharmacy. I have had some problems with my arm and the doctor prescribed for me a new Medication. I waited in line and when it was my turn, I handed the prescription to the Pharmacist. She told me to come back ... Читать далее...
22. A state-of-the-art watchA cowboy walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then causally looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, «Is your date running late?» «No», he replies,»I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just ... Читать далее...
23. A man is waiting for his wife to give birthA man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 21 years, ... Читать далее...
24. Being Under StressWei: What’s wrong? You look like you’re in pain. Jason: My stomach is Acting up again. Wei: It’s all of this Stress. I don’t know how anyone can Cope with the Pressures you’re under. Jason: It’s nothing. I’ll just take a pill for my stomach. Wei: That won’t solve the problem. Look at you. You ... Читать далее...
25. The room was full of pregnant ladiesThe room was full of pregnant ladies and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. The teacher then announced, «Ladies, exercise is good for you. ... Читать далее...
26. Перевод слова stomachStomach — желудок, живот, аппетит Перевод слова Disordered stomach — расстройство желудка pain in the stomach — боль в желудке on an empty stomach — натощак good stomach is the best sauce — хороший аппетит — лучшая приправа My Stomach rises. Меня тошнит. His Stomach worries him. Его беспокоит желудок. She got him on the ... Читать далее...
27. A man decided to have a face liftA man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really great about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, «I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think ... Читать далее...
28. You can’t bring that dog in this barA man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says «You can’t bring that dog in here!» The guy, without missing a beat, says «This is my seeing-eye dog.» «Oh man, » the bartender says, «I’m sorry, here, the first one’s on ... Читать далее...
29. Latex factoryA guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud «hiss-pop» noise. «The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold,» explains the guide. «The popping sound is the needle poking ... Читать далее...
30. University courses for men and womenWhatsamatta University’s Seminars For Men Fall Catalogue Once again, the female staff at Whatsamatta University will be offering courses for men of all marital status in an attempt to help males and females understand each other better. Attendance in at least 10 of the following is required. 1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You Too Can Do ... Читать далее...
31. Emery fixed himself a Scotch while waitingEmery fixed himself a Scotch while waiting for Maria to get ready for their date. She came out of the shower wrapped in a bath towel and said, «I’m sorry I’m late but I was shopping and lost track of time. Would you like to see me in my new dress?» «I would like nothing ... Читать далее...
32. Punishment for GatesSatan greets him: «Welcome Mr. Gates, we’ve been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You’ve been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you’ve got me in a good mood, I’ll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you’ll be locked ... Читать далее...
33. A young married couple has difficulties conceiving a babyA young married couple has difficulties conceiving a baby, so after a while the wife consults her doctor, who recommends the minor of three possible operations. The operation is performed, but a month later, she’s still not pregnant, so she goes to see the doctor again. This time he recommends the medium operation, a somewhat ... Читать далее...
34. Cow on Train TracksA passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. «What’s going on?» she yells out the window. «Cow on the track!» replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees ... Читать далее...
35. Chaim escapes from a mental hospitalChaim escapes from a mental hospital and goes to the train station. He gets on the train and is seated next to a business man. He asks the man, «Are you Jewish?» The man says, «No.» Joe apologizes. Ten minutes later, he asks, «You wouldn’t happen to be Jewish would you?» The man replies, «No!» ... Читать далее...
36. The congregation was sitting and waiting for the preacherThe congregation was sitting and waiting for the preacher to began his sermon when two masked men burst into the church and said «Whoever is not willing to take a bullet for Jesus better leave now.» More than half of the congregation jumped up and ran out the door. The two men took off their ... Читать далее...
37. Three men die in a plane crash and are waitingThree men die in a plane crash and are waiting to enter heaven. St. Peter asks the first man, «What did you do on Earth?» Man #1: I was a doctor. St. P.: Go right through those pearly gates. St. P.: And what did you do on Earth? Man #2: I was a school teacher. ... Читать далее...
38. An American was waiting on a London street cornerAn American was waiting on a London street corner. An attractive English girl was passing by when a gust of wind blew her dress above her waist. «A bit airy, isn’t it?» remarked the American. Hearing this, the Cockney girl replied indignantly, «‘Ell yes! What did you expect — feathers?!»...
39. Two children are in a doctor’s waiting roomTwo children are in a doctor’s waiting room, and one of them is crying. «Why are you crying?» asked the other child. «I’m here for a blood test, and they’re going to cut my finger.» When he heard this, the other child started to cry. «Why are you crying?» «I’m here for a urine test.»...
40. Two elderly Southern women are sitting on the verandaTwo elderly Southern women are sitting on the veranda sipping lemonade and reminiscing about old times. One says to the other, «Darling, do you remember the minuet?» The other replies, «Sweetheart, I can’t even remember the ones I screwed!»...