Mary came back from lunch to find that all the girls

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1. Good girls vs. Bad girlsGood girls loosen a few buttons when it’s hot. Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons. Good girls only own one credit card and rarely use it. Bad girls only own one bra and rarely use it. Good girls wax their floors. Bad girls wax their bikini lines. Good girls blush during ... Читать далее...
2. Last LunchThree steel workers were having lunch at the construction site, a 20 story building. The first worker is Italian and when he looks in his lunch box, he exclaims, «Oh, no, if I have to eat spaghetti for lunch one more time, I going to jump off the 20th floor and kill myself.» The second ... Читать далее...
3. Two law partners leave their office and go to lunchTwo law partners leave their office and go to lunch. In the middle of lunch the junior partner slaps his forehead. «Damn,» he says. «I forgot to lock the office safe before we left.» His partner replies » What are you worried about? We’re both here.»...
4. Three girls died and were brought to the gatesThree girls died and were brought to the gates of heaven. Upon entering the gate, they were halted by St. Peter and his obedient angel. St. Peter asked the girls, «Before entering you must answer this simple question.» «Which is…?», they replied in unison. «Have you been a good girl?», he asked the first girl. ... Читать далее...
5. Once when Mary was young her schoolOnce when Mary was young her school had a halloween party for them mary decided to go as a pirate after she had donned her costume she went into the family room to show her family they were impressed. Mom said you look terrific mary you have your sabre, and your parrot on your shoulder, ... Читать далее...
6. Mary was having an affair during the day whileMary was having an affair during the day while her husband, John, was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend, Ralph, and she heard her husband’s car pull in the driveway. She yelled at Ralph: «Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window my husband is home early!» Ralph looked ... Читать далее...
7. This elderly woman passed a police van loading up the girlsThis elderly woman passed a police van loading up the girls from a local brothel, and as she passed by, she asked one girl what the lineup was for. the girl shrugged and said, jokingly, «cough drops» and snickered. Just then the cop approached the old gal and said, «What are you doing here, m’am?» ... Читать далее...
8. Eating a School LunchChris: What are you doing? Let’s get into the hot Lunch line. Sybil: See this Lunchbox? My mom made me Brown-bag it today. She says that the lunches served at school aren’t Nutritious enough. Chris: That Sucks. What did she make you? Sybil: A salad. Chris: Oh, Gross. I really feel sorry for you. What ... Читать далее...
9. Two young girls were talking about their sex livesTwo young girls were talking about their sex lives when the first girl says, «Oh my god! , it was really great, but I was Sooo scared after his rubber broke. I didn’t get a good night’s sleep for a week.» «What happened.» Says her intrigued friend. «I didn’t know what I was going to ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод слова lunchLunch — обед, ланч, второй завтрак Перевод слова Half lunch — легкий завтрак alfresco lunch — завтрак на свежем воздухе box lunch — обед фабричного изготовления в упаковке They joined us for Lunch. Они присоединились к нам за обедом. They broke for Lunch. У них перерыв на обед. He blew $50 on Lunch. Он выкинул ... Читать далее...
11. John and Mary visit their pastor for marriage counselingJohn and Mary visit their pastor for marriage counseling. The pastor gets up and hugs Mary, and sits down. He gets up and hugs Mary a second, and third time, and then turns to John and says, «See that, John. Mary needs that EVERY DAY!» John replies, «Well, that’s fine, Pastor. But I can’t bring ... Читать далее...
12. Mary went to Jill’s place to tell her about a horribleMary went to Jill’s place to tell her about a horrible experience she’d had the previous night with this bloke she brought home. «Well, what happened when you got there?» Jill asked «The bastard called me a slut!» Mary said. «And what did you do then?» Jill asked, shocked. «I told him to get the ... Читать далее...
13. Значение идиомы doll up[doll up] {v.}, {slang} 1. To dress in fine or fancy clothes. The girls dolled up for the big school dance of the year. The girls were all dolled up for the Christmas party. 2. To make more pretty or attractive. The classrooms were all dolled up with Christmas decorations. Compare: DECKED OUT....
14. Значение идиомы out to lunch[out to lunch] {adj.}, {slang}, {informal} 1. Gone for the middaymeal. 2. Inattentive; daydreaming; inefficient; stupid. Neil Benderis just out to lunch today....
15. Sister Mary burst into the office of the principalSister Mary burst into the office of the principal of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion parochial school in an advanced state of agitation. «Father!» she cried, «just WAIT until you hear this!» The priest led the sister to a chair, and said, » Now just calm down and tell me what has you so excited?» ... Читать далее...
16. Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a sharkMary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man. The man was screaming, «Help me! Help me!» Mary Jane laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to help that man!...
17. Значение идиомы lay low[lay low] {v.} 1. To knock down; to force into a lying position; toput out of action. Many trees were laid low by the storm. Janewas laid low by the flu. 2. To kill. The hunters laid low sevenpheasants. 3. See: LIE LOW....
18. Значение идиомы in on[in on] {prep.} 1. Joining together for. The children collectedmoney from their classmates and went in on a present for theirteacher. 2. Told about; having knowledge of. Bob was in on thesecret. The other girls wouldn’t let Mary in on what they knew....
19. A man gets home early from workA man gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. «What’s up?» he says. «I’m having a heart attack,» cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone for ambulance, but just as he’s dialing, ... Читать далее...
20. Mom, can little girls have babies?Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, «Mommy, can little girls have babies?» «No», said his mom, «of course not.» Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, «It’s okay, we can play that game again!»...
21. Two Girls, a Golden Balloon, and FateChance is a strange thing. Over the course of history, truly astonishing things have happened — the man who won the lottery twice in one day, or the woman who was struck by lightning four times, for instance — but most of these circumstances have been dissected by statisticians and scientists, and demystified. Sometimes though, ... Читать далее...
22. Launching an Initial Public OfferingZoe: What are you looking at? Midas: It’s the Prospectus for Boogle’s IPO. I wish I could Get in on the Initial public offering, but since I can’t, I’ll buy stock as soon as the company becomes Publicly traded. Zoe: I’m not really familiar with how the Stock market works. You mean you’re going to ... Читать далее...
23. Following a Dress CodeTae: What are you doing? Why are you taking all of my clothes out of my suitcase? I just finished Packing that. Nicole: You’ve packed all of the wrong things. We’re going on a Luxury cruise and all you’ve packed are shorts and t-shirts. Tae: I’m going on vacation and I don’t have To dress ... Читать далее...
24. Bad Manners at a Business LunchYolanda: I will never invite George to another business lunch with Clients again! Sunan: Why, what happened? Yolanda: George has the worst Manners of anyone I know. First of all, he was ten minutes late. And as soon as he sat down, his cell phone rang and he answered it! Sunan: Maybe it was an ... Читать далее...
25. Значение идиомы out for[out for] {prep.} Joining, or planning to join; taking part in;competing for a place in. John is out for the basketball team. Mary is going out for the school newspaper. Compare: TRY OUT....
26. What marketing isNow I understand what marketing is: You are at a party and you see a very pretty girl. You approach her and tell her: «I am very good in bed». That is Direct Marketing. You are at a party with a group of friends and you see a very pretty girl. One of your friends ... Читать далее...
27. A beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor surgeryA beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor operation. She’s laid on a trolley bed by a lady in a white dress and brought to the corridor. Before they enter the room she leaves her behind the theatre door to go in and check whether everything is ready. A young man wearing a ... Читать далее...
28. An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old ladyAn attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady, entered the doctor’s office. «We have come for an examination,» said the young girl. «Alright,» said the doctor. «Go behind that curtain and take your clothes off.» «No, not me,» said the girl. «it’s my old aunt here.» «Very well,» said the doctor. «Madam, stick ... Читать далее...
29. Значение идиомы dress up[dress up] {v.} 1a. To put on best or special clothes. Billy hated being dressed up and took off his best suit as soon as he got home from church. 1b. To put on a costume for fun or clothes for a part in a play. Mary was dressed up to play Cinderella in her ... Читать далее...
30. Перевод слова nakedNaked — голый, явный, неприкрытый Перевод слова Invisible to the naked eye — невидимый невооруженным взглядом naked aggression — явная агрессия to strip smb. naked — раздеть кого-л. донага naked confession — голословное признание Her Naked body was found in a field. Ее обнаженное тело было найдено в поле. They stripped me Naked. Они сорвали ... Читать далее...
31. Значение идиомы take stock in[take stock in] {v. phr.}, {informal} To have faith in; trust;believe. — Usually used in the negative. He took no stock in theidea that women were better cooks than men. They took little or nostock in the boy’s story that he had lost the money. Do you takeany stock in the gossip about Joan?...
32. The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infantThe young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant. «Doctor,» she explained, «the baby seems to be ailing. Instead of gaining weight, he lost three ounces this week.» The medic examined the child and then started to squeeze the girl’s breasts. He then unbuttoned her blouse, removed the bra and began powerfully sucking on ... Читать далее...
33. One day, little Billy comes home from kindergartenOne day, little Billy comes home from kindergarten for lunch. Not finding his mother in the kitchen, or the living room, he heads upstairs to check her bedroom. He opens the door, and what does he see, but his father, who had also come home for lunch, stripped naked, on top of his mother, also ... Читать далее...
34. The headmistress at a girls prep schoolThe headmistress at a girls’ prep school in the old South (circa 1959) calls down to the army base and speaks with one of the officers: «We’re having a social here at school and I was wondering if you could send some of your nice young men to attend.» «Why of course,» the Lieutenant answers. ... Читать далее...
35. Перевод слова officeOffice — офис, должность Перевод слова Judicial office — судебная должность holder of an office — должностное лицо lawyer’s office — адвокатская контора editorial office — редакция His Office was bugged. Его офис прослушивался. He was removed from Office. Он был отстранен от должности. Foreign Office Министерство иностранных дел (в Великобритании)...
36. Биография Мэри Кассат на английском языке. Biography of Mary CassattMary Cassatt is the most popular women artist in the USA. She was born in 1845 in a town near Pittsburgh. She began her career at the Pennsylvania Academy of Fine Arts, where she studied from 1861 until 1864. She studied in Paris, too. Mary Cassatt began her career as a realistic painter. Later she ... Читать далее...
37. Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunchBill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton, «Are you ready to order?» Clinton replies, «Yes, I’d like a quickie.» «A quickie?!?» the waitress replies. «Sir, given the current situation of your personal life I don’t think that is ... Читать далее...
38. Значение идиомы rub off[rub off] {v.} 1. To remove or be removed by rubbing; erase. Theteacher rubs the problem off the chalkboard. After Ann shook handswith the president, she would not shake hands with anyone else becauseshe thought that the good luck would rub off. 2. To stick tosomething touched; come off. Don’t touch that charcoal, it will ... Читать далее...
39. Значение идиомы in stock[in stock] {adj. phr.} Having something ready to sell dr use; inpresent possession or supply; to be sold. The store had no more redshoes in stock, so Mary chose brown ones instead. Compare: IN STORE, ON HAND. Contrast: OUT OF STOCK....
40. Getting a Bad ReputationLance: Did you see Kim at the party last Saturday? Paulina: Yeah, I saw her. Why? Lance: She was wearing a Skimpy dress and all of the men were Leering at her all night. I used to think she was a Nice girl. Isn’t she worried that she’ll get a Reputation? Paulina: A reputation for ... Читать далее...